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A Shadow of What Was	By : katami Category: Bleach > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 49594 -:- Recommendations : 3 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 88
- 89
- 90
Author's Notes: The holidays are finally over, praise be to whatever god wants the credit. And after about three-hundred starts and stops and revisions I'm finally happy with this chapter. Blasted cat! *Katami glares at Grimmjow, who just grins and shoots her the bird* "That's it! No more cats!" *The muse stalks out looks between Grimmjow and Katami, whip in hand* "Is the naughty writer bothering you, Grimmjow?"

I will take a moment to say hi to all the new people who took the time to show their support and also to thank all the people who have put up with me from the start. I get a kick out of knowing that my sanity is going to a cause people enjoy.

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Shunsui gently helped Jyuushiro to his feet, letting the pale haired man lean against him without a word. Grimmjow watched the display, something inside him twisting and slithering uncomfortably. In the dim recesses of his past he remembered his sire and dame leaning together that way, curling close. And occasionally curling around him or offering a lick or tolerantly allowing a pounce. He pushed the ancient memories away with a soft rumbling sound of displeasure and snorted, rising to his feet and dusting himself off. They were dead and that life was gone. Forever. Besides, he was trying to figure out the fucking Shinigami and his sire and dame had nothing to do with that.

One of the junior officers stepped towards the two captains, sharp blue eyes locking on the movement, a low, menacing growl rising in the Arrancar's throat - a threat and a warning.

"Come on, kitty-cat. I think you and the children need some time apart," laughed Shunsui, catching his wrist and gently tugging him away from the younger man and closer to them. Grimmjow stumbled at first, but followed, his eyes locked not on the captains at his back, but at the half dozen other Shinigami milling around watching them. Instinct said that attack, if it came, would come not from behind him but from the young hotheads in front. The Arrancar growled a faint protest as hands gently seized both his arms, carefully but firmly, and urged him away.

"Come on, Grimm-chan. We'll get you some nice milk, maybe some salmon or a bit of roast, you'd like that wouldn't you?" cajoled Jyuushiro. Grimmjow gave the junior Shinigami one last menacing growl before cautiously turning. Milk was good. And milk would mean petting because everything seemed to lead to petting with Jyuushiro and Shunsui. But petting was also good.

He hated to admit it, but the gentle scratches and caresses the Shinigami lavished on him were nice, soothing in a way nothing had been since his earliest days in the den. He gave Jyuushiro and Shunsui a mild noise of irritation - not a sound of true annoyance but a small sign that he was not just surrendering to their will. He was coming because he wanted to. Both men smiled at him and indulged the fiction, and in return Grimmjow let himself be led out of the courtyard and away from the other Shinigami. When he felt Jyuushiro lean slightly against him the Arrancar grumbled softly and shifted to take more of the Shinigami's weight, earning a startled look from both captains and giving them both a snarl in return.

"Well, we've escaped the youngsters, now we just need a destination," laughed Shunsui, pausing to take a swig from a flask and passing it to Jyuushiro. The pale haired noble eyed the canister for a moment before taking a smaller sip and passing it back. Grimmjow intercepted it and sniffing at the sake before taking a cautious sip, rolling the liquid over his tongue. It tasted better than it smelled he decided, swallowing the sake and taking another belt of it.

Shunsui stole the flask from him with a mournful look that drew a soft chuckle from Jyuushiro which fell to a hollow, hacking cough. Both Grimmjow and Shunsui froze to stare at him, the blue haired man watching as blood blossomed and was quickly wiped away. "Home would be good," murmured Jyuushiro, sounding tired, his voice stirring an uncomfortable feeling in Grimmjow's chest. He didn't like that, didn't like the Shinigami hurting. The former Espada tried to brush the feeling away, instead focusing on keeping Jyuushiro steady and taking in the sights and sounds of the Seireitei around him. The high white walls all looked the same and sent another fissure of unease through him - and made him realize where Aizen had gotten his decorating ideas. The Shinigami navigated the maze easily, seeming unconcerned with the white walls boxing them in.

"Look at the sky, sweetheart. This isn't Las Noches," soothed Jyuushiro, a pale hand caressing his arm even as blue eyes darted up to stare at the foreign sky. He stared at the bright, sweeping expanse of blue, stopping only when Shunsui stopped, staring at a section of wall that looked no different than any other - even the dark doorway in it matching one further down.

The world behind the doorway was as alien as the white walls had been familiar. Jyuushiro and Shunsui stepped through into a sea of green. The ground was covered with thick, green grass, the trees were cloaked in delicate green leaves and all around him flowers bloomed, their brilliant colors only helping to highlight the green.

Grimmjow sniffed the air suspiciously, his nose wrinkling and a tiny sneeze escaping him as a thousand scents overwhelmed him. He steadied himself on the wall for an instant, Shunsui leading Jyuushiro deeper into the garden and helping him settle beneath a plum tree before disappearing for a moment. When he returned the captain of the Eighth flopped into the grass next to the other man and handed in a small vial. The pale haired man drank the liquid with a sour look before snuggling in next to Shunsui and sighing softly.

Grimmjow eyed them both and stalked into the riot of green, prowling the garden, examining all the sights and sounds and smells, like a cat turned loose for the first time. He slunk around, sniffing at this or that and as his mind whirled. He glanced back at the two Shinigami sitting peacefully together in the shade, their heads bent close and the soft sounds of their voices blending with the musical babble of running water and the gentle rustle of the wind through the leaves.

The feline-like Arrancar cocked his head to stare at them, trying to reconcile the conflicting ideas of Shinigami and mates. Shinigami were the only real threat to a hollow above Adjuchas class - unless one was stupid enough to take on a Vasto Lorde or a pack, and most people that stupid didn't live long enough to reach Adjuchas level. The Shinigami though were hunters, mate killers, kit killers... Only they weren't only that. Aizen and his had been the ones to hurt him; Jyuushiro and Shunsui petted him and feed him. Even the others who might have been able to hurt him instead left him in peace, even Kurosaki who hated him had made - if not peace, then at least agreed to a truce.

The Arrancar growled softly, claws digging into the rich brown earth, green grass sliding against his skin. Grimmjow stopped and stared down at the strange landscape, the alien smells that rose from it and the foreign feel of it against his skin. That was why the idea was so hard to accept, he finally realized. Accepting the idea of Shinigami as mates, taking them as such, it would be a quiet admission of the truth -

He would never be going home.

Hueco Mundo would never again be his home. He would no longer hunt glittering white sands, the moonlight and wind his only companions. Even if Aizen was miraculously defeated tomorrow he couldn't go home. He was no longer just a hollow, he was something more, Aizen had seen to that, twisted and shaped him into something both more and less than he had been before. A pang of denial twisted through him, drawing a small yowl and causing both Shinigami to stare at him in concern.

He wheeled away from them and continued prowling, claws flexing as he tried to understand the strange tangle of his own feelings. The sands were home. And they would always be a part of him. No matter what happened, some tiny part of him would always long for the cool moonlight rather than the bright sunlight; but carving out a survival in whatever patch of earth he could hold was no longer enough. He didn't care about claiming some patch of territory. It was more than that though. He wasn't alone any more.

He had the kitten. A pack mate. He couldn't just up and leave the brat; and Kisuke would never leave Kurosaki. Besides, the kid still wasn't ready to cut his teeth on the sands. It was hard to equate human age to hollow age, hollow maturity was based more on power than anything. When viewed in terms of power the kitten was little more than a newly weaned cub. The brat was powerful, but he was also still locked within the confines of flesh; and human flesh was not meant to house Shinigami power.

"Grimm-chan?" A gentle voice cut across his thoughts and drew frost blue eyes to a warm concerned face. The Arrancar stared at Jyuushiro for a moment, seeing him perhaps for the first time. Kind eyes set within a gentle face, a face that was human, but still attractive. Sculpted cheekbones, determined chin, elegant nose and all of it framed by silky hair that somehow always seemed to carry the scent of lilac and musk.

And Shunsui, who was dark to Jyuushiro's light, more rugged but still handsome. Shunsui who smelled of fresh cut grass and sake, whose stubble tickled, but whose hands were always gentle. Who irritated the hell out of him, but who petted him and fed him. Grimmjow prowled slowly towards them, staring at them, tasting the subtle ebb and flow of their power, breathing in their scent. All of it good. All of it soothing rather than threatening. He stopped and just looked at them, his eyes wide and a strange stillness settling over him.

A single long digit batted his nose, breaking Grimmjow from his reverie and making him cross his eyes to try and glare at the finger. Rich laughter rang out, that joyous outpouring of Shinigami emotion that was so foreign and mystifying to the Arrancar. He snapped as the finger retreated, more out of habit and some vague feeling that it was him the Shinigami was laughing at. The gesture earned him another burst of laughter and a kiss from Shunsui.

Grimmjow gave a low, soft rumble as a clever tongue caressed his bottom lip and slid into his mouth. He could come to like kissing, he thought as Shunsui's lips continued to gently tease his. Fingers carded through his hair, petting him and scratching gently behind his ears. The rumble in his chest rose almost against his will as the Shinigami gently urged him forward. He slunk closer and was rewarded with a soft groan from Shunsui, who deepened the kiss, and Jyuushiro scratching him harder.

Blue eyes shot open as the kiss slowly ended, and Grimmjow found himself in a stretched crouch between the two Shinigami, both watching him with something that was a mixture of tenderness and wariness. He growled soft wordless annoyance at them, wishing he understood them or they understood him. There would have been no such fucking around if he was dealing with another of his kind. When hollows met there were only three possible outcomes - they ignored each other, they fought, or sometimes, very rarely, they took one another as a mate.

"What the fuck do Shinigami know about mates?" he demanded quietly, watching them and trying to gauge their reactions.

The two humans shared a look, Jyuushiro giving him a tender smile and Shunsui offering a bright grin. "As the term applies to Hollows probably very little, but Shinigami care about each other, marry, and raise families," offered the captain of the Thirteenth. "The rituals and the promises we make may not be the same, but we do all the same things Hollow's do, love." Grimmjow weighed the answer, not finding any fault with the logic. He wished again for the kitten, knowing the blonde would be able to couch the terms in something he could be sure he was interpreting correctly. With the Shinigami everything came down to words, but out on the sands pretty words didn't mean anything - it was blood and death and strength that mattered out there. His tail twitched restlessly and claws kneaded the grass and earth, both Shinigami sharing a look.

"Here," soothed Shunsui, pouring him a bowl of milk, the rich smell filling the air and making his mouth water. He took the bowl cautiously, giving the milk another sniff before delicately tipping the bowl to his lips and lapping at the liquid, blue eyes never leaving the two men.

They fed him, they had fought with him and against him and proven themselves able both times They were Shinigami and they were not from Hueco Mundo; but Grimmjow was beginning to suspect he could do a lot worse than taking Ukitake Jyuushiro and Kyouraku Shunsui for his mates.

Blue eyes flickered between the two men, a low rumble rising from the Arrancar's chest. He could do far worse, but the Arrancar was beginning to think finding anyone better would be a feat. They would make good mates, strong mates.

Grimmjow set the milk aside, no long interested in it. He slunk forward, enjoying the confusion and hint of concern in the Shinigami's eyes. A tiny pounce knocked Jyuushiro back into the grass and drew startled yelps from both men, Grimmjow purring happily at the hint of nervous tension in the men and the tiny touches of fear that colored their scents.

The cat-like man bent low, breathing deeply, almost tasting Jyuushiro - the saltiness of human sweat, hints of water and ozone, the subtle scent of lilac - all of it swirling together on his tongue in a heady mixture. Grimmjow purred, gently butting the noble's jaw, tilting his head and baring the Shinigami's throat. He gave another happy rumble and licked at the pale flesh, feeling the Shinigami's pulse jump beneath his tongue and liking it. "Mine?" he growled softly into Jyuushiro's skin.

Jyuushiro drew in a sharp breath. "Yours," he affirmed softly. Sharp fangs flashed, piercing the delicate skin over the pale haired man's carotid artery. The Shinigami gasped and bucked, Grimmjow gently but firmly slamming him back down. The warm taste of blood - rich, slightly bitter and coppery - danced over his tongue, laced with power - the oceans, rich and deep, terrible and endless but also serene and teeming with life. Grimmjow grinned and licked soothingly at the bite as long fingers tangled in his hair, the noble slowly responding as pleasure began overwhelming pain. "Mine," purred the Arrancar happily, stretching out atop the other man.

Jyuushiro arched into him and pulling him into a kiss. Shunsui's hands were on his shoulders, the dark haired man's grip relaxing as Jyuushiro grew warm and pliant beneath him. It might not have been an hollow beneath him, but this was just as good decided Grimmjow as the kiss slowly ended and the captain of the Thirteenth continued to kiss and nibble along his jaw. Teeth grazed his throat and Grimmjow gasped as the gentle scrape sent a rush of anticipation and pleasure singing through his body. He turned his head and offered his throat to the Shinigami captain, blue eyes meeting Shunsui's dark eyes.

"I think our kitty wants a love bite, sweetheart," suggested the captain of the Eighth with wry amusement. Grimmjow gave him a growl, the contented lassitude falling away as the Arrancar rose, blue eyes sparkling with feral hunger.

Shunsui held up his hands, the feline figure leaping before he could say a word and bowling him over. Grimmjow grinned down at him, fangs showing and giving the Arrancar's smile a slightly menacing look, the gleam in this eyes making him making him look savage and wild. "Saying something," he challenged, watching as a sparkle flared in the other man's dark eyes. Strong fingers tangled in his mane and Grimmjow rumbled approvingly as the Shinigami jerked him down into a hot, wet kiss, tongues and teeth crashing together. The Arrancar moaned, definitely liking this. There was nothing of Las Noches in the fierce, hungry press of Shunsui's lips, only heat ... the sweet promise of battle, their bodies entwined in the cool sand, the feel of their power swirling with his...this was good he decided.

"Mates," purred Grimmjow softly as the kiss ended. "My mates."

"All yours, kitty-cat," affirmed Shunsui.

*~*~*~* Shadow Tidbit *~*~*~*
Kisuke sighed, staring calmly at the figures arranged across the table from him.

"You are not going," Love insisted with a soft growl.

"I am and there is nothing you can do to stop me," he retorted with that same infuriating calm he had been using all morning.

"We were told to watch your lame ass. That does not include traipsing off to see your boyfriend," snapped Hiyori, glaring murderously at him, most because she knew he was right.

"Let me summarize the situation. I am going to speak to Kurosaki Ichigo. I am going to because there is no way for you to stop me from doing so. You can't keep me here - short of typing me up, gagging me and binding my reiatsu. Even if you do that, you still have to let me loose to eat and use the restroom - and unless someone stands watch over me every minute I'm loose, I will escape.

"I can slip out a window without even trying. I can blast a hole in the wall easily unless Hacchi is there to keep me bound. And let's be frank, Hacchi is good but Tessai is better and I learned from him. And I never had a problem when it came to kidou theory - I can tear apart any spell Hacchi can cast. Even if you could keep my power bound, something I highly doubt, I can make mustard gas from the things in the bathroom or a bomb from the things under the sink in here. Either would provide a nice distraction for an escape. And that is overlooking Benihime," he told them, watching as several of the Vaizards glanced at Hacchi, clearly asking if the giant man thought he could told him. The huge Vaizard gave a tiny shrug.

"Of course, I could always just go with a more passive approach.," purred the blonde, grinning evilly. "If I don't show up you will have to call Ichigo to reassure him I am alright. Ichigo will undoubtedly want to talk to me. If you don't let me go I will not only not reassure him, I will tell him that I am being held against my will." He grinned at them, a smile that was all sharp angles and hard edges - the captain's smile. "You will then have one highly irate Kurosaki Ichigo out for your blood.

"Would anyone like to reconsider their position?" asked Kisuke sweetly.
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A Shadow of What Was