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Bleach Mini Stories And Snippets	By : Strailo Category: Bleach > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 27548 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 2
Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach and Batman, or Weiss Kruez. Please See full disclaimer within.

Chapter List
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Title: Whoopsies
Fandom: Bleach/Batman
Pairings/Characters: Shirosaki/Ichigo/Renji, some Bruce/Dick referencing, Joker, Harley
Word count: 2,385
Warnings: Some violence
AN: Something short and funny, I swear. *chuckles* I hope you guys enjoy. :D Really.

And before anyone asks, I may write a full length story between Batman and Bleach. No idea.

Enjoy.

*~*~*~*

It all started with an invitation to go to a convention in Gotham, home of Batman and his Bat family. And they had gone. Ichigo was to be a guest panelist on a writing panel while Shiro and Renji were playing as his ‘guards’ and ‘assistants’ as far as anyone had been told. They were also working as walking advertisements for Uryu’s newest cosplay line, their friend supporting the costs that Ichigo’s publishing company hadn’t.

Their first day there had been spent with Ichigo and Shiro running around as Ran Fujiyama and Farfarello from the Weiss Kruez manga and anime. They had smirked at the fact that the manga was actually a play on one mission that the original ‘Weiss’ and ‘Schwartz’ had done together nearly ten years before they had retired from that world. The men had gotten together and written it, drawing it themselves. Doing so, they had changed their last names, looks and personalities.

At least to a point. Ran really was a light redhead with deep purple eyes, but he was very open with friends.

They had also ended up handing out nearly all of the cards that they had stashed on their bodies in various places, and the cards that Renji was carrying in his backpack as he played assistant. Ichigo had also done his first panel in full costume must the panel goers. Several of his fans had expressed quite a bit of surprise at the fact that he spoke English so clearly. He pinned the blame on the fact that his friend Sado spoke a mix of Spanish, English and Japanese.

He had learned how to speak English as well as he had in self preservation.

It was the second day thought hat the idiots of Gotham couldn’t stand the thought of not having a raid on something bit. On that day though, surprisingly, Ichigo and Shiro had decided to go for Joker and Harley costumes. Renji just smirked when Ichigo had shrugged off the fact that the Harley costumes were essentially based off a woman’s outfit. He knew that his lovers would like it so he wasn’t going to complain.

When Uryu had created the sub-line of his ‘Bad Boys and Naughty Girls’ line to cover the various infamously famous villains and villainesses, he had worked on a lot of research. Mostly into what they had all worn or looked like over the many years. The Joker line alone had the most selection offered with the Harley collection coming in a close second.

Their choice of outfits though had come from different time periods.

Shiro had spray dyed his hair the well known green color and used contacts to turn his eye color to a black shade. He had learned when he had first taken a solid form to turn his scarlea to white instead of black, so he was safe on that. He had then pulled on the iconic purple suit that Joker had first worn when he had come out, complete down to the smallest of details. All of it done by Uryuu just for him for future conventions. When he had pulled out the white make up, Ichigo had told him to forgo it outside of a setting base for the rest of his needed makeup since his skin was naturally white.

Ichigo had chosen to forgo the one piece body suit and hood that Harley had worn for so long, and gone with something that was more contemporary, an outfit that she had worn in the last couple of years. It was still the same color scheme as all of her other costumes, red and black in four panels going red-black on top and black-red on the bottom. But it was in two pieces instead of one.

The outfit consisted of form fitting leather pants that he claimed were a lot more comfortable than they looked and a top that was more like a vest than a shirt. It was sleeveless with the neck coming down to about half an inch under his clavicle in a square shape. The pants were black on the left side of his body and red on the right, with the top doing the opposite.

Since the top had been made with males in mind, instead of the buckle corset that came with the female version, the buckles instead ran down the ribs. When they were buckled they could take in or let out about an inch of fabric that was created to not bunch and lay smooth under it. He finished off the outfit with a pair of boots that were a specialty set from Uryu’s budding shoe line. They came up to over his knees, red on the black half of his pants and black on the red side, the heel sitting low and continuing the pattern of color switch.

Renji was still drooling over the sight even as Ichigo had applied the white makeup and blood red liquid lipstick that he had chosen to go with. He had stared as he had pulled his surprisingly long hair up into pigtails, curling them with a fat curling iron before he had finished the outfit with the belt that held his ‘weapons’.

Once outfitted, they headed down to the con and started to walk around, taking pictures, answering questions, and handing out cards. It was as they were walking through the main congregation area of the convention that the Joker and Harley decided to make their entrance.

“Oh you have got to be fucking with me,” Ichigo yelped as he and Shiro dived behind a booth, the owner diving to hide under her supply table, letting her table cloth hide her. The skylights above them were shattering as the villainous couple dropped down through them, cackling as their goons came down after them. “I swear we have some luck,” he muttered as he slowly sat up, having landed on his hip and side.

The floor of the building the convention was in was far from forgiving.

“Ah, come on love,” Shiro drawled as he shifted to look around the booth tent’s edge, finding that the goons were running around to drag everyone around into the main area. “It just means that we get ta have some fun,” he chuckled.

Ichigo just rolled his eyes at him as Renji snorted and slipped under the side of the tent to get to the girl in there to move her somewhere else. “I swear that you a bloodlusting maniac,” he snorted at his lover.

“And ya knew this when I started ta materialize ta fuck ya,” Shiro drawled as he watched a vibrant red spread under Ichigo’s face paint. The redhead just glared at him before shifting to stand up. “Gonna go kick some ass?” he asked.

“Going to have to actually,” he sighed. “Who know’s how long it’ll be before the Bats and their Birdy get here,” he said as he moved into a better position so that he could get a running start. He pulled off his belt and handed it over to his lover. “Can you work with Renji and get the people out of the way?” he asked as he watched the Joker cackle in front of the group of people.

Shiro smirked at him and nodded before he followed after their other lover. Ichigo sighed and reached up to make sure that his hair ties were going to hold. Once he was happy with that fact, he moved into a more open view with a smirk on his lips. “Oi! Ugly! Your mother was a pig Oni!” he called out, having selected his first henchman to take out. The man swung around to scowl at him as the rest of the people on the floor turned to watch as Ichigo took a running start at him.

Timing it right, Ichigo started to do a series of flips, gaining speed and power as he launched himself feet first at the man using his hands, landing on the man’s chest with an audible thud. Pushing off of the guy, sending him backwards as he himself flipped backwards, Ichigo landed in a crouch near by as he watched the guy go down. “Timber,” he drawled as the man landed hard on his back, trying to get his breath back.

Ichigo snickered at the sight.

“Puddin’ am I seen’ what I think I’m seein’?” came a high voice that fairly dripped with excitement.

“If you mean that you’re seeing a pretty young man that is dressed in what looks to be the male version of one of your old costumes taking down one of our boys, then yes, dear, you are,” came the reply from a richer voice. It was also dripping with excitement and the ‘ha’ that followed the sentence was full of amusement.

“You know, I really, really do hate bullies,” Ichigo drawled as he smirked with full red lips, his eyes turning to the goon that was rampaging towards him. The rest of the idiots were following the first one. He cackled much like his albino counterpart did, his two lovers finding a solid table to sit on and watch as he took down the goons with ease. His movements were a lot like water, fluid and ever moving as he twisted, kicked, punched, tossed, and took down goon after goon.

He thought he had caught the Joker once, sending him flying, seeing as he was now twisting and dodging an enraged Harley’s attacks. He was glad that Yoruichi had helped him to learn such moves and how to use them best.

Ichigo snickered as he finally took her down and taking the rather nice whip that was offered by a guy who was cosplaying Indian Jones to tie her up with. Several guys who were all dressed up like the main characters of some swimming anime jumped on the twitching Joker to tie him up with banner ropes. “Nice whip you have there,” he said, standing up as the guy smirked.

“Yeah. Nice outfit. Ya free for some lunch?” He asked. Ichigo shook his head and pointed at Shiro and Renji. He sighed as he watched his white counterpart laugh himself straight off of the table.

“As much as they drive me into insanity, I have those two. Go and ask that really cute guy with red hair though? From what I’ve seen he’s been eyeing your ass for the last three minutes,” Ichigo drawled, patting his arm before strolling over to his lovers. He hopped up onto the table with a smile. “Go get me a blueberry swirl?” he asked Renji as he very carefully pulled money out of his back pocket, handing it over.

“Sure, I’ll go do that for you,” Renji chuckled. He shook his head as he walked off. As the last of the goons were tied up using various things, including what looked like a Sailor Venus bow from one girl’s outfit, the Bat family finally made their entrance. They dropped in from the broken skylights, landing and coming to a standstill at the fact that a tall man with very visible facial tattoos were walking around a bunch of tied up goons and people in costumes.

“You guys are kinda late,” came the sung words from a young man who was dressed up like a male version of Harley. They noticed that he was sitting next to a Joker. “I kicked their asses a good ten minutes ago. And let me tell ya, I’m going to have to tell Uryu to maybe cinch the ass just a bit more and allow some more maneuvering room in the legs.”

“That’s right, some of his costumes are going to be used in acts, aren’t they?” Renji drawled as he handed over the requested drink to his long haired lover before he handed over their other lover a grape swirl. He kept the kiwi swirl and sipped at the slushy goodness as he leant against the counter.

“What do you mean by that? I highly doubt that you could have done that,” Batgirl said, frowning heavily at three men. To her eyes, they didn’t look to have any kind of training.

A pretty young girl who was decked out as Sailor Mars parted from her group and held up her phone, showing the fight that she had caught on it. “Well, it looks like you’re wrong, Batgirl. He did do it,” Nightwing laughed, shaking his head as police sirens wailed in the distance. “Nice outfits,” he said, eyeing them. “Where’d ya get them?” he asked.

“It was made by a friend,” Shiro said, shrugging. “Look up ‘The Dead Purifiers’ and ‘Souls Reaping’. He owns both of the companies. Souls Reaping is the cosplay side though,” he continued, sucking on his drink as he smirked at the narrowed eye Batman.

“Thank you for your help,” Batman stated after a few moments before he turned and left again, using a grappling hook to haul himself out of the broken skylights. Robin, Nightwing, and Batgirl all left quickly after, Batgirl sending them a narrow eyed look before she did so.

“I bet you ten to one that Batsy there knows what we are,” Shiro snickered before he sipped his drink again, having to suck hard to get the ice there.

“Nah, no bet. He knows Diana-san and she’s most likely told most of the Justice League about us,” Renji said. “I can still remember all of the paperwork that she had sent in to tell the inner circle very well. My poor hand wouldn’t hold a damn pen for a good week after without cramping and spasming.”

“Oh, do you mean like when it’s time to do the recruiting paperwork?” Ichigo asked as he sent his lover an innocent look. “Ain’t ya glad that you guys are actually using computers now?” he asked.

“I still need to sign things, but now I can fill it out and print it before then,” Renji drawled before he shrugged. They looked at Shiro, finding him staring at the broken skylights.

His next question made his two lovers blink at him. “Ya think that Batsy and the older birdie are fuckin’?”
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Bleach Mini Stories And Snippets