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A Shadow of What Was	By : katami Category: Bleach > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 49594 -:- Recommendations : 3 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Author's Notes: I have vicious people reading this story. All this hatred toward Orihime...I thought I was going to get urged to go easy on her and instead I get cries for blood. Who knew?

This is getting memory italics but it is actually a present time dream - just want to make sure we are clear on this. Also, there is yaoi, if the idea of a hot redhead and blonde having sex bothers you, run away now - you have been warned.

Since I hit Iron Dog up for an UraIchi drabble I am obligated to try and drum up five drabbles of my own. So, if you would like me to write you something, swing over to my journal and drop me a line. If you want something Bleach, I am willing to write Shadow drabbles. It might take a little while since, as I have said, life sucks until August or so.

* * *

He walked through the halls in a daze, not seeing the long familiar corridors, not caring about them. He knew what he wanted and it was not in the hallways. He turned into the training room, his instincts carrying him swiftly to the pool.

"I was wondering when you would get here," welcomed a familiar voice in a jovial tone.

Ichigo froze, his eyes almost unwilling to believe what his heart and reiatsu were telling him. Kisuke stood there in the water, steam rising around him gently, and droplets rolling down his body. Only, it wasn't any version of the blonde Ichigo had ever seen before. The physique was that of the younger him, but that silvery scar was back on his chest and Urahara's hat sat low on his head, casting his gray eyes in shadow. The smirking smile on his lips was full of warmth and laughter, full of promise in a way Mizuno hadn't yet mastered. The blonde' reiatsu was dancing around him and over him and Ichigo groaned at the softy teasing touches that were so achingly familiar.

"Kisuke?" he breathed, hardly daring to hope that what he was seeing could be real.

The smile was achingly sweet and welcoming with just a hint of amusement - it was Kisuke's smile. The one for him - just for him. Pale arms reached out for him, promising a warm embrace, the familiar shelter he had been without for so long. Ichigo found himself in the water an instant later, heedless of his robes, and wrapped in the blonde's arms as he crushed the younger man to him. Tears streamed over his cheeks and he sagged against his love. "Kisuke...Oh god! I missed you. I missed you so much," he breathed into the blonde's shoulder, the words tumbling out as he choked on his tears.

"Hush, love. Hush. It's alright, Ichigo." Soft lips grazed his temple and warm hands petted his hair and stroked his back. "Did you really think I would ever leave you? Or stop loving you?" asked the blonde softly.

Ichigo froze at the whispered words, pulling back to stare at Kisuke, tossing his hat aside in annoyance as it hide the blonde's eyes from him. "Hey! There is no call to abuse my hat," scolded Kisuke pouting. "You and Yoruichi. What is this objection you people have to hats."

"Say it again," demanded Ichigo almost desperately.

"What? About the hat...or about loving you?" murmured the blonde, merriment lighting his eyes and a wicked smile curving his lips.

Ichigo shivered and Kisuke pulled him close again, crushing him against his chest. "I do, you know - love you. I think I've loved you since the beginning," whispered Kisuke, his voice thick with emotion and his chest heaving.

"I love you too," breathed Ichigo, his arms going around the other man. "Only you."

They clung to each other in the warm water, oblivious to everything but each other. Eventually Kisuke tugged the sodden robes from his body and steered them to the edge of the pool. He sat on one of the seats carved out of the rock, gently tugging Ichigo down so he sat between the blonde's legs. The younger man's arms wrapped securely around his waist and his chin hooked over Ichigo's shoulder, a contented sigh slipping from both of them. Sandalwood tickled Ichigo's nose as tears prickled his eyes again. It was so achingly familiar - so perfect - as if Kisuke had never left him. His own arms dropped to hold the blonde's, leaning back slightly, almost afraid to relax for fear of the moment dissolving.

"I'm not leaving you. I'll never leave you, love." Ichigo tightened his grip on Kisuke, not sure he could stand it if Kisuke left him again.

"Remember the last time we did this?" asked Ichigo quietly, earning a soft noise of agreement.

"You dunked me," accused Kisuke with a pout.

"And you splashed me," he reminded Kisuke, kissing the tip of his nose, unable to keep a smile from tilting his lips.

"I always splash you," replied the blonde, his nose rubbing gently against the side of the redhead's face.

"You do," agreed Ichigo, finding he had missed the mildly annoying bit of fun. Soft lips grazed his neck and Ichigo shivered. "I also remember some other things we did here," purred Kisuke, his voice a warm and playful purr. Slender fingers danced lightly over his chest, teasing him with the slightest of brushes and making him wriggle to try and get more.

"Kisuke," he moaned softly, twisting to stare at the blonde, his face a mixture of hope and longing. Warm lips touched his in a chaste soothing kiss before returning for another deeper kiss. A wet tongue traced along the seam of his lips and white teeth carefully tugged at his bottom lip. He opened his mouth with a soft sigh, his tongue meeting the blonde's gently at first but quickly twining with Kisuke's as the kiss grew heated and hungry. Their hands clutched at each other, caressing and exploring, each refamiliarizing himself with the feel of his lover.

Ichigo groaned as his tongue twined with Kisuke's, sinking into the kiss with blissful abandon. Nails gently scored his back as his own fingers dug into Kisuke's waist. There would be bruises on the pale skin in the morning, but he couldn't quite bring himself to regret it, and judging from Kisuke's response he didn't think the blonde would either.

He made a small sound of denial as their lips broke apart, sighing when the blonde began kissing his throat. He tilted his head to allow better access and was rewarded by warm lips fastening to his pulse point. His fingers tangled in silky blonde hair and Kisuke made a soft sound of annoyance as he dragged the younger man's head up so he could explore. His lips trailed teasingly over an elegant throat and sharp teeth nipped at the delicate skin, dragging a cry of delight from the blonde.

Soft hands - hands not yet calloused by centuries of sword wielding - slid over his chest, mapping and petting. Ichigo arched in the touch and redoubled his attention to Kisuke's throat. He gasped in surprise as long finger teased his nipples, circling them before tugging on them gently. He nipped Kisuke's throat and ducked his head to lick at the blonde's nipples, earning a groan and those skilled fingers tangling in his hair. He smirked, letting one hand linger on Kisuke's chest while the other sank lower. His hand brushed Kisuke's thigh as his eyes caught the younger man's, he could see the longing in them and gently trailed his fingers over Kisuke's cock.

Kisuke moaned and his hands slid down to clutch Ichigo's ass, kneading the firm flesh. "I love you," Ichigo murmured as his hand closed firmly around Kisuke's cock, drawing a startled breath from the blonde. Ichigo gave the younger man a querying look before smiling. �You know, this is going to be fun,� he smirked, beginning to slowly move his hand.

Kisuke bit his lip to stifle a small sound of pleasure, taking a moment to calm himself before asking in a breathy tone, �What will be fun?�

�Watching you go off at the drop of a hat. I�ll finally get to be the one to drive you out of your mind,� chuckled Ichigo, his strokes growing faster, with a quick flick of his wrist each time he reached the tip.

�Gods!� gasped Kisuke, arching into the touches as his breathing grew ragged. Ichigo smirked, savoring the transformation passion wrought on the other man - his body taut, his head tossed back and his features slack. He was the most beautiful thing he�d ever seen, thought Ichigo.

A fingertip teased his entrance and the redhead moaned softly as gray eyes slid open to regard him with mischievous delight. �I might be younger, but I�m still me, Kurosaki-kun,� purred Kisuke as the finger slowly breached him. Ichigo groaned and leaned forward, kissing the blonde as that single finger began to move.

�So tight,� breathed Kisuke as Ichigo panted against his shoulder. It had been too long, he reflected as the blonde kissed the side of his face and slowly stretched him. �All this time?� whispered the younger man, his expression tender.

Ichigo bit his lip and nodded, not trusting his throat to words. �I wouldn�t have minded, love,� soothed Kisuke, carefully adding a second finger. Ichigo groaned softly at the slight burn. �I would have,� he told the younger man quietly. �There was no one but you, Kisuke. No one else...It was always just you.�

The smile Kisuke gave him was small and soft, but heartrendingly beautiful. �I know,� whispered the blonde, because it was the same for him.

The fingers twisted inside him, drawing a low noise of pleasure from Ichigo. His grip on the blonde�s cock faltered as those long fingers brushed his prostate. He whimpered, body arching and trying to push the fingers deeper, to enjoy that wondrous bolt of pleasure again. �Beautiful,� whispered Kisuke and Ichigo groaned. A third finger slipped inside and Ichigo tried to will himself to relax. Kisuke smiled at him, kissing his face as those finger carefully opened him.

He felt the younger man hesitate when he was stretched, clearly reluctant to carry things forward without lube, and gently lifted himself off the blonde�s fingers, earning a slightly baffled look from his lover. �Can�t wait. Need you,� he explained with a moan, shifting and slowly lowering himself onto Kisuke�s cock. The blonde gasped, his fingers digging into Ichigo�s hips and his whole body straining. Ichigo panted as his muscles stretched and burned, it hurt, but it was a good hurt, he thought as he clung to the blonde.

Kisuke trembled, his eyes closed and his grip vice-like on Ichigo�s hips. �Don�t move,� he ground out and Ichigo could tell he was close, the knowledge drawing a smile to his lips despite his own body�s strain. �Love you,� he panted, arching and trying to move as Kisuke fought him. Finally, Kisuke�s control broke with a tiny whimper and he flexed his hips, both of them biting their lips at the sensation. Ichigo groaned and slowly lifted himself before slipping back down just as slowly. They moved carefully, soft sounds of pleasure coming from the both of them.

It was unhurried, the water moving around them in small eddies, and it was better than he remembered, thought Ichigo as he reached down and began stroking himself. Kisuke gave a soft sob, closing his eyes and pulling him down hard. A tiny hitching noise slipped into his breathing and Ichigo kissed him hungrily, grinding down on the blonde�s cock. Kisuke wailed, the sound swallowed between their mouths and came. Ichigo groaned and sped his movements on his own cock, gasping as one of Kisuke�s hands fell to help him. He stiffened and came with a silent scream, slumping against the younger man, holding him tight.

�I love you,� he whispered with a soft kiss to the side of the blonde�s neck.

�And I love you. No matter what happens, Ichigo, I love you. I always have and I always will,� promised Kisuke. He glanced up, brown eyes locking with mercurial gray eyes and smiled at his lover. He wasn�t sure how long they sat there in each other�s arms, touching softly. His fingers grazed Kisuke�s stomach and the blonde squirmed, making the redhead smirk. He tickled the blonde, earning a peel of laughter before Kisuke splashed at him and tickled him back. They struggled until they were both breathless and smiling, unable to contain their laughter. It was childish and silly, but as they sat there panting, leaning against each other, their eyes bright, both of them grinning - it was perfect realized Ichigo. It was laughter and love and comfort and all the myriad of other joys Kisuke had brought to his life.
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A Shadow of What Was