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A Shadow of What Was	By : katami Category: Bleach > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 49594 -:- Recommendations : 3 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 36
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- 38
Author's Notes: Not longer than 10 chapters? Oh, Asbiel, hon, are you ever in the wrong place. I am estimating Shadow to run about 100 chapters by the time all is said and done. I am following two established relationships, forging three, and handling a certain fox. I will be grateful if I can stop at 100. (Although my beta, bless her and curse her, is already trying to talk me into a sequel - or two.)

And don't worry Erin, labeling became a problem early on so I just call him Kisuke for now. I love how everyone assumes he left under his own power though.

* * *

The alarm had dragged him from the shower and Ichigo was not pleased about it. He hated sitting through meetings wet. He especially hated sitting through meetings called in the earliest hours of dawn wet - no good news ever came before the sun.

Hitsugaya, Jyuushiro, Shunsui, Yoruichi, Kurotshuchi, Byakuya, Ishida, Renji and he were seated around a too small table. Their table had never been intended for more than five or six people and was seating nine, with others crammed in around the walls. He sat wedged between Renji and Ishida, which he would have chalked up to concern if it hadn't been for the way the whole table was subtly watching him. Something bad had happened and it had something to do with him. He closed his eyes, wondering how much more he could stand. Every nerve felt raw and his control was slipping away.

It will be alright, murmured Zangetsu and he thought he heard Shirosaki add his two cents with a 'wimp'. Benihime's contribution was a soothing little wisp of song.

There were several loud thumps and a small explosion before the door to the conference room was thrown open. Grimmjow stood towering in the doorway, panting and radiating fury. "Where the fuck is the kitten!?!" he snarled, his voice more of a growl than anything else.

Ulquoirra stood behind him, the voice of sweet reason, which the other Arrancar had totally abandoned. "The human is no longer in the medical ward and Grimmjow has taken his disappearance poorly," murmured the former fourth Espada.

"So I broke their fucking door," snapped Grimmjow, glaring at his companion. "The kitten is missing!�

And there was what they were all so worried about, thought Ichigo, too numb to give his companions the explosion they so clearly expected. Besides, Grimmjow was doing an excellent job all on his own. He was soul weary and heart sore. In a few hours, rage or despair might come but he wasn�t sure about even that. He needed time to process the last few hours and come to an equilibrium again - although it looked like that wouldn't be happening any time in the near future.

"We are aware of the situation," growled Hitsugaya, giving the Arrancar a frigid glare.

"There�s no need to panic, Kisuke hasn't left the base. All the exits are guarded and sealed to his spirit signature," murmured Yoruichi. �So he�s got to be here.�

"Meaning we just have to find him," added Shunsui with a sigh. Something they all knew was easier said than done. Kisuke had mostly given up hide-and-seek by the time they had become lovers but the blonde had told Ichigo dozens of times about merry chases through the Rukongai, or the Academy, or Sereitei itself. Most of those had been for fun, but Ichigo didn't doubt for one minute Kisuke could apply the same skills to this hunt if he wanted to.

�What I want to know is how the hell he got mobile?� growled Hitsugaya, he looked strained and pale, his wound likely bothering him, thought Ichigo. �I was told he would be immobile for nearly two days."

�He was responding much better than we expected to the healings,� supplied Hana from the east wall where he stood squeezed in.

�He was also probably performing spells of his own to speed his recovery. The human has shown an aptitude for kidou,� announced Ulquiorra, earning frowns from everyone but Byakuya.

�We already knew he was doing kidou; it's no surprise if he was remembering other spells,� said Yoruichi with a shrug.

�Fuck the kidou! What are you going to do to find him?� snarled Grimmjow, glaring at them all.

Ichigo caught Ulquiorra rolling his eyes and a faintly sympathetic look from Byakuya, wondering briefly what that was about. He hadn�t thought the captain of the Sixth was acquainted with the Arrancar or likely to become so. Years and Rukia had helped thaw the noble slightly, but he was still an ice prince in Ichigo�s opinion.

�Ulquiorra, if you could please remove Grimmjow to your quarters. We shall handle this matter as swiftly and efficiently as possible. This is however, a Shinigami matter,� murmured Byakuya, earning a nod from the smaller Arrancar.

The fourth Espada grabbed his companion�s arm and began to drag him away, Grimmjow growling and cursing the entire time. Ichigo even thought he saw the larger man try and throw a punch, which Ulquiorra deftly avoided before turning annoyed green eyes on the sixth Espada.

�He does have a point. We need to find Kisuke,� he muttered, hating the idea of agreeing with Grimmjow, especially now, but not wanting to lose Kisuke. He knew given time and a little bit of motivation Urahara would be able to find a way past all their precautions; this younger version of him seemed to have the Urahara brilliance and knack for causing trouble in spades. He wondered for a moment if this Kisuke had Urahara�s luck. The blonde had joked that he had the worst luck in the entire universe - to compensate for his charm, brilliance, and good looks. The thought drew a faint, sad smile to his lips before his mind returned to the meeting.

They had pulled up diagrams of the base and were dividing up how to search it. Jyuushiro and Youruichi had volunteered to take the medical wing. Renji and Ishida were taking the Third�s wing. He and Shunsui would search the Fifth�s domain. And Matsumoto, Rukia, and Byakuya would handle the search of the Tenth. Word would be sent to the sentries as well as the shouten so that everyone would be on guard and ready to detain Kisuke if they saw him. It was a good plan if one overlooked the fact that the base was huge - holding three divisions and a small contingent from two more, the Fourth and the Twelfth. Kisuke could easily avoid them for days if he hid well and was willing to risk doubling back into already searched areas.

Ichigo sighed and wished a fond farewell to the idea of sleep any time in the near future. �Kurosaki Karin and I will be coordinating the effort. I expect hourly progress reports,� Hitsugaya was saying, earning weary nods from all present. They stood and Ichigo reflected that it had to have been one of the shortest meetings in history, clearly there was a certain logic to denying them all sleep and having an injured commander - it made everyone eager to get things done.

He trudged back to the Fifth Division with Shunsui. "Can you organize things within the division for the search? I want to try something," he murmured softly, pulling Benihime from his hip and staring at the sword.

She really was a remarkable blade. Delicate and beautifully worked but just as fierce and dangerous as Zangetsu or any of the other zanpakutou he had ever encountered. She suited Kisuke, he thought sadly, mysterious and beautiful, powerful but never showing it.

"Ah, going to speak to the lovely lady?" asked Shunsui brightly. "I can begin the search and handle Hitsugaya-kun if you think she can help us."

Ichigo nodded his thanks. "I don't know if she can help, but she is linked to Kisuke. She might be able to tell us where he is like a game of hot and cold. I have to see." He left Shunsui in the division office, retreating to his private office. He settled into his chair with a sigh and wondered for just a second if he could rest, recover just a little.

A moment after he closed his eyes he was standing on the side of a building staring at Benihime and Zangetsu, who had an arm protectively around her. Shirosaki stood a little apart from the two swords, ignoring them all - or pretending to - Ichigo knew he would hear every word they said.

"You came to talk about Kisuke," murmured Benihime.

He nodded. Rain was falling in his soul; a steady, solid downpour that seemed designed to weigh down everything it touched. "He's missing. We need to find him."

"I cannot sense him," murmured Benihime, her tone soft and apologetic.

"We think he might be unconscious. He has never been blocked from her like this, even when he was with the Arrancar there were impressions of him. Now she can sense nothing," explained Zangetsu.

"No, you dummies think he's unconscious. I keep telling ya, he wouldn't have left, Hat-n-Clogs was one smart fucker and it ain't smart to wander around wounded in hostile territory," muttered Shirosaki, earning raised eyebrows from both Ichigo and Zangetsu.

"What? If dickhead there doesn't find him it's never gonna stop raining," grumbled the Hollow, disappearing in annoyance.

"You know, it's a little scary when he makes sense," muttered Ichigo, rubbing his eyes.

"Agreed. He does make a certain amount of sense however. Urahara had no reason to leave the medical ward and this level of blockage would suggest more than simple hiding - especially since the boy has no knowledge of any need to block Benihime," replied Zangetsu, wrapping his dark coat around Benihime as she shivered faintly.

"So someone stole him?"

Both swords nodded. "That is Shirosaki's preferred theory; but we can neither confirm nor deny it."

"Fucking hell," snapped Ichigo, a spark of anger rising inside him again. How dare anyone steal Kisuke!

"I am sorry we are unable to help you, my bearer. If it brings you any solace, you may know that I have spoken to a portion of my master and he is...conflicted over his feelings for you. He does not yet remember all you were to each other but he is not without feeling for you. I think, were he not so injured and in such turmoil from all the upheaval in his life, he would ask for time to remember and to know you once again."

Ichigo took a breath, hope laying a seed in his chest. He had seen his Kisuke for a moment back in that medical ward. He had. His lover was still there, he was just waiting. "It does. Thank you, Benihime," he told her, coming forward and kissing her cheek, the tiniest hints of a smile coming to his lips as both zanpakutou stared at him.
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- 38
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A Shadow of What Was