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Stand in the Rain	By : ShadowedEcho Category: Bleach > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 2047 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach, no money is being made by me, this was written purely for entertainment purposes

Chapter List
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Ichigo woke slowly. His brain felt foggy and sluggish. He didn't hurt, that alone was enough to pull him further into consciousness. There was a warm blanket draped around his sturdy frame, and a soft mattress beneath his curled up body. Trying to stretch out from the fetal position he found himself did have a hiss of pain escape his lips, stiff and sore muscles screaming in protest. He immediately stopped moving trying to return to his pain free state, but now that he had reminded his tired body of the stress it had endured, the pain refused to relent.
There was suddenly a gentle hand on his shoulder, and a soft voice called to him, "Ichigo, you're finally awake. Try not to move, I will do what I can to help with the pain." It took Ichigo's foggy mind a moment to place the voice.
"Hanataro?" Ichigo rasped the question out of dry lips.
"Yes, you are safe in one of my squad's healing rooms." Hanataro replied, slightly distracted with gathering his Spirit Pressure, readying himself to eliminate as much pain as he could. "I alerted the Captain to your awakening, she will be here in a few moments." He informed as he sent the healing Kido into Ichigo.
With Hanataro's help, Ichigo's muscles lessened their screaming to a dull ache, and for the first time since being chained, Ichigo was able to fully stretch out his body. Even during his forced exercise with the Espada he had not been allowed the luxury of stretching, causing even more damage to his already injured body.
Retsu took the moment where Ichigo was splayed out like a starfish to enter the room. "You have finally decided to rejoin us, good." She spoke calmly, but had to repress her chuckle as the boy floundered upright on the bed, flushing a bit at being caught in such an undignified manner.
"Captain Unohana," He greeted, making her wonder why only Jyuushiro and herself earned his use of their proper titles. "How long was I gone?" He was unsure of himself now, looking down at the white bedspread and clean robe he had been dressed in, refusing to look her in the eye.
Unohana answered him gently, sending a dismissive wave to the seventh seat to give her some privacy with her patient. "Kurosaki, you were held captive for six months, you have been recovering here for five days now."
"Ichigo," He responded blankly, shocked at the length of time, "Call me Ichigo."
"All right Ichigo, now will you allow me to examine you?" She phrased it as a question, but Ichigo didn't have any doubt it would become an order if disobeyed, so he nodded permission.
Feeling her strong, but gentle, power flow over him he allowed himself a sigh of relief, no one had been that gentle in Heuco Mundo. Even Szayel had been forceful as he healed, but a memory popped into his head, Grimmjow had told him it was Szayel that drugged their leaders. Was the pink haired narcissist helping him, or had Grimmjow simply pounced on a golden opportunity?
"Whatever you are thinking of, stop, your power is interfering with my scan." Retsu interrupted his thoughts, causing Ichigo to realize he had been unconsciously releasing his power, weighing the air down heavily.
"Sorry." Ichigo mumbled, struggling to regain a bit of control, "I keep remembering things."
She finished the scan before replying, "That isn't unexpected, you were held for a very long time, and Aizen is known for interfering with the mind more than the body. You are recovering swiftly, a little quicker than I was expecting truthfully, but you will still be weak for a few weeks. The Seki Seki rock used against you left some after affects."
Ichigo figured if he didn't talk a little bit, the memories might just drive him insane, so he spoke, "The memory wasn't of Aizen, but the person he had healing me. His power was rough and overbearing, yours is so much nicer."
Sensing his need, she was a good healer and knew the mind had to heal for the body to be in top shape, she helped him talk, "Who was it healing you?"
"Szayel Aporro Granz, the eighth Espada, and the embodiment of madness," Ichigo responded dully, "He may have helped in my escape, but I'm not sure it was intentional." Ichigo's shame rose back up as he remembered the details of breaking the collar.
Retsu wasn't sure if the time was right, but she didn't know when she would get a chance to speak to him alone again, "Ichigo, I know an Arrancar helped you out of your confinement. The information has been kept quiet to protect you, but I need to know, which one was it? Was it this Szayel who added their power to yours?"
Ichigo closed himself off at the question, only Junichi's presence and Zangetsu's gentle words managed to persuade him that there was no disgust driving the question, only concern. "Why do you need to know?" He hung his head in shame again, and no amount of comfort from his soul companions could make him raise his head.
"All Hollows have slightly different abilities, and I need to know if there is anything I need to check you for after receiving such a large influx of foreign power." She explained patiently.
"No, it wasn't Szayel, he only created the distraction. The one who helped me was the Sixth Espada, Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez." Ichigo's voice was so low Retsu could barely hear him.
"He is a feline type, correct?" She didn't want to hurt Ichigo, but the less he locked away, the better in the long run.
Ichigo nodded, "Yes, and he has some potent powers in his released form, but he was in his normal form while helping me."
Unohana nodded, "Your Hollow is also an animal type correct?" She continued to question.
Ichigo tilted his head curiously, "Yes, lizard, but how did you know that?" He knew all the captains were aware he was a Visored, he hadn't known they had been looking into the situation any deeper.
"So far all the Hollows we have come across have a basis in the animal kingdom, I wanted to know if that held true for you," She admitted. Retsu was curious about Visoreds, the healer in her wanting to know all about potential future patients.
"Want me to tell you what I know of Junichi? In repayment for patching me up," Ichigo offered.
She couldn't resist the golden opportunity. "Junichi? Your Hollow has a name?"
Another nod, "He does now, it's a recent development, Visored Hollows are nameless to begin with. I have talked to him so much, and he revealed a few things to me, that I thought he earned the right to a name, just as my Zangetsu has one." Ichigo felt both mentioned parties perk up at hearing their names, Junichi seemed to be laughing, while Zangetsu watched on silently.
"What has he told you?" Retsu prompted.
Ichigo cocked his head, listening to his inner voices, discussing how much to tell, "The most important bit is that Junichi and I are not separate entities, unlike a Zanpakuto that joins with a Shinigami soul, my hollow makes up half of my soul. He is me, just a darker, slightly more vicious version of me." Ichigo explained.
"I suspected as much," She admitted.
"What made you think that?" Ichigo asked incredulously, it had to be slapped into him, literally, before he realized it.
"A Zanpakuto can only suggest and advise actions, it's generally a good idea to listen, but we don't have to obey. Your Hollow can control you, mentally and physically, if you let your guard down. He wouldn't be able to if he didn't already have a piece of your soul to manipulate." Retsu explained her observations.
Ichigo was stopped from replying immediately by Junichi's voice in his head, "She's right. I think I like this one, not many would have noticed that."
Retsu was surprised to hear a low chuckle from Ichigo, "Something funny?"
"Oh, I'm not laughing at you, it's Junichi. He likes you by the way." Ichigo explained before she could get mad at him.
"A Hollow admitted to liking a Soul Reaper?" She didn't seem mad at him, that was good, he never wanted to see her angry.
"Yeah, but he is my Hollow, Junichi was bound to be a little odd." Ichigo smirked at Junichi's string of obscenities following the statement. "Anything else you would like to know?"
"Who is in control when you call your mask?" She hadn't been able to figure that part out.
Ichigo paused a moment, before deciding he might as well answer, "We both are. The mask is a symbol of us working together, when I'm in Shinigami form I am in control, when I go into full Hollow form he is. We can both use Zangetsu, but the feel of our spirit pressure changes depending on which of us is the dominant mind."
"Okay I think that is enough for now," Retsu halted him, "You need to know what has been planned for you."
"What's going on?" Ichigo tensed up again, but he ignored the ache in his muscles in favor of listening to her.
"The Head-Captain has decided to keep you in Soul Society until you recover from the Seki Seki stone, and he wants you to make a full report on your captivity before he will consider sending you back to the living world. During your stay, you have the choice of a few different squads to stay in, all recommended because you already know some members of them. You will train alongside the officers of the squad while Captain Kurotsuchi and I monitor your recovery." She explained Yamamoto's plan.
It took a moment to absorb into him, but he soon nodded, "All right, doesn't seem too bad. Which squads do I have to choose from?"
"Squad 11 with Captain Zaraki, Squad 10 with Captain Hitsugaya, Squad Six with Captain Kuchiki, and Squad 13 with Captain Ukitake," She laid out his choices.
"Well Squad 6 is out, I'm friends with Renji, but Byakuya and I have never gotten along. I don't think I will go to Squad 10, Toushiro still gets mad at me for dropping his title, and he has his hands full dealing with Rangiku. So either Squad 11 with Kenpachi and Ikkaku, or Squad 13 with Captain Ukitake and Rukia," He thought aloud, with Retsu agreeing with his assessment.
"May I make a suggestion?" Retsu inquired.
"Sure," Ichigo allowed.
"Stay with the 13th, and visit the 11th for the occasional spar. I have put a lot of effort into healing you, I'd rather not see you here more than once every couple of days. Also, I think you may find a bit of company at the 13th, if you keep your eyes open." She warned him, knowing she was being vague, but not wanting to state the true reason for sending him to Jyuushiro, "Oh and one more thing, why do you address everyone so familiarly, except for Captain Ukitake and me?"
Ichigo smiled softly, an expression Retsu had never seen on him, "I drop titles on people I'm either friends with, or that I don't think has earned their title. I want my friends to know I am supporting them, not the title they hold, or their family name no matter how prestigious. Those I don't like or respect in any way I will use their last name, make it impersonal and cold, and I will not use the title I don't think should be theirs. For you and Captain Ukitake, I haven't spoken enough with you to be friends, but I respect you enough that I think we could be, so I use your proper title and will wait until I know you a bit more before dropping all formality." He shrugged a bit towards the end.
Retsu was lost on just one thing, "Wait, you said you use the first name of your friends, but last names with those you aren't friends with, than why do you use Byakuya's first name?"
Ichigo sighed, "He isn't a friend, but I do respect him. Byakuya earned the use of his name when he took the hit for Rukia once Aizen's plan unfolded. I realize he probably sees it as rude, but to me I'd rather acknowledge who they are, than get floundered down in titles."
A slightly mischievous smile bloomed on Retsu's place, "Oh he would definitely see that as rudeness. I've known Byakuya since he was a child, he truly isn't that old for a Shinigami, and he was determined to not live in his grandfather's shadow instead he worked towards making a name for himself. He just had one small issue in his younger days, it makes him a bit touchy now."
Ichigo burned with curiosity, Retsu successfully pulling him out of his dark thoughts with the change of subject, "What was the issue?" He wanted to know really bad now that he knew there was something to learn about the cold Kuchiki.
Retsu sent a silent apology to her fellow captain before replying, "When Byakuya was young, he was not handsome, instead he was pretty. I do believe he had several admirers in the academy that, if it weren't for the uniform, may have thought he was female. It made a lot of his classmates underestimate him. He has fought hard to grow out of that image."
Ichigo blinked slowly a few times, before a wide grin split his face, "They thought Byakuya was a girl?"
Retsu nodded, "And even when they found out differently they still treated him like he was delicate, and the appearance of Senbonzakura didn't help. My squad healed no small few of his year mates when he decided to prove them wrong. He had a temper issue in his youth, much like your own."
That brought the smile off Ichigo's face, "Wait he actually showed emotion?"
"Yes, a great deal of it at times, but that story is for him to tell if he feels like it." She had told him enough to embarrass the noble, no need to rub salt in old wounds.
"Captain Unohana, I apologize for the interruption," A worried voice called as frantic knocking sounded on the door to Ichigo's sick room, "Captain Ukitake has collapsed again."
"I must go Ichigo, I will be back once I have him stabilized," Retsu informed, before rushing out to follow her squad member to Jyuushiro.
Ichigo reclined back onto his bed, relaxing into the comfortable mattress, so different from the cold stone floor he had been chained to.
Six months. It had really been that long? Ichigo thought maybe one or two months, but six? Had Aizen truly messed with the days that much, or had he zoned out for longer than he thought? What about his family, were they looking for him? Did Aizen use his dreadful Zanpakuto and wipe their memories clean of him? What about Rukia and the others here in Soul Society, did they know what happened to him?
Retsu had said she kept the details of his escape out of her report. How much had she covered up? He had to make a full report to the Head Captain, would he have to tell about Grimmjow, or could he gloss over that part?
All the questions swirled in Ichigo's mind. It hurt to think about it all. It hurt to wonder what had happened since he left, and what would happen now. His body was sore and aching, the treatment Hanataro and Retsu had administered was wearing off. He flopped on his side and curled up in the fetal position, tucking himself as tightly together as he could manage with his protesting muscles.
He thought he got through the discussion with Retsu all right. He hadn't flipped out on her. Though if he hadn't been so disoriented already, Hanataro's hand on his shoulder may have made him leap out of his skin. He couldn't get the memory of Aizen's touch off his body. The shame rose to engulf him as he remembered those teasing, stroking, possessive touches. He was Aizen's Pet. Nothing but a creature to be shown off and locked in a gilded cage. A passing thought hit him. At least if his shame was discovered, it would bring Aizen down to the same level. The ex-Captain's ministrations brought on his shame in the first place.
Grimmjow was an entirely different matter. With Aizen, each touch had sickened him as much as it aroused. Grimmjow invoked lust, pure and simple, he could claim no coercion or lack of consent against the Arrancar, Ichigo had been willing, even eager towards the end. Grimmjow could have just taken him, and not bothered to explain what was happening, but no he had taken the time, no matter how mocking and demeaning the explanation had been. He had essentially given Ichigo a choice, which was more than Ichigo had expected.
Ichigo reached around to touch the back of his neck, the bite was still there, the amount of spirit pressure forced through it slowed its healing. A shiver ran down Ichigo's spine. That bite had felt good. The first time someone else's power had entwined with his own, joining without trying to overpower. The pain of it had faded into the pleasure and rushing power until it wasn't recognizable as pain. That pain had woken his mind, just as that power had broken him free. It brought him back to feeling human, albeit a damaged human, but not the soulless existence he was rapidly fading into in the later days of his captivity.
In one fluid movement he stretched back out on the bed, ignoring the protest from his muscles. He was done curling up. The scars on his mind and in his heart would be there for awhile to come, but he had his freedom now, and he would not squander his second chance. Dropping of the bed and onto the floor, he stretched himself out properly, the way his father and Urahara had couched into him as he grew older. Grimmjow had told him to get stronger, there was still a chance he could win. He needed to get stronger, and nothing would hold him back from that.
When Retsu returned looking tired and worried, she found her patient on the floor doing sit ups. He didn't hear her open the door, and thus didn't stop his efforts. His eyes were focused on a spot on the wall, not allowing himself to think of anything but the solid repetition of the movement, of squeezing each muscle before steadily allowing it to relax again. He did not move quickly, but the strength in each bunching of muscle and sinew was impossible to miss.
"I do not remember clearing you for training yet Ichigo," She interrupted him as she saw the sheen of sweat on his brow and the pain induced tightness around his eyes, he was in pain but ignoring it in favor of something he deemed more important.
He startled and sprang to his feet so quickly Retsu would have sworn he used flash step, but his power hadn't spiked like it would had he used that technique. He dropped into a fighting stance, hands held steadily in front of him ready to fend off his attacker, before the reality of the intruder broke through his consciousness, "I'm sorry, you startled me." He dropped his hands quickly, his gaze lowering to the floor when he realized he had just threatened the person who had healed him.
Retsu was glad she had practice controlling her reactions, otherwise he might have noticed just how much that move had scared her, no one should be able to move that fast, or have a fight or flight response so incredibly instinctual his body was moving before his mind knew there was a threat. "It's alright Ichigo, I should have knocked. Now tell me why are you out of bed when you weren't given clearance?" Dear Kami this boy was powerful, no wonder Aizen held him like some kind of prize, Ichigo was quite the trophy.
His eyes hardened, and he lifted his gaze to meet her, his serious expression making him look four times his true age, "I need to get stronger. Aizen captured and beat me once, that is never going to happen again. I was given a second chance, I will not waste it."
There was no fire to his words, no passion, and that was more terrifying than the move he had pulled when she drew his attention, this young man was nothing if not passionate about his beliefs. He was pushing himself like this because he thought he was supposed to, not because he wanted to, "Ichigo if you keep going like this you will hurt yourself, you are not healed yet. Six months of seki seki exposure, it has affected you more than you think. Please stop now and heal, return to training when you are healthy." Maybe if he waited that long he would get some of his fire back.
"I can't wait it's too important. I fought and won against Byakuya when I was half-dead from Bankai training. I nearly died fighting Kenpachi. Hell, half of my soul has been trying to devour me from the inside out, or I thought he was any way. I have been fighting when I was supposed to be too weak or injured to move, and I still win. I can't stop now just because of a little fatigue." He argued, not wanting to give up on the one thing he had to keep himself going.
"Ichigo, this isn't good. You keep pushing, and pushing, and you will eventually push your body over the edge and we won't be bale to patch you up again. If you don't believe what I say, than follow me, there is something you need to see." She needed to break through to him, or Ichigo was going to kill himself.
Ichigo was taken aback by her words, but she was leading him out of the room before he could answer, he didn't have much choice but to follow her. He heard rumors about the Fourth Squad captain when she was displeased with something, he didn't really want to confirm the rumors.
A few doors down from his sickroom, Retsu knocked lightly and entered another, waving Ichigo in with her. "Ichigo this is what happens when you push your body beyond its natural ability to heal."
Ichigo looked inside and first all he saw was pink, the pink draped form of Captain Kyouraku was sitting in a chair next to the bed, eyes glued to the slender form on the bed, Ichigo following his gaze to the white haired Captain lying there.
Captain Ukitake had his eyes closed, but he was sweating and paler than death, his breathing was labored and heavy. There was no doubt the man was very, very, ill. "What happened to him?" Ichigo asked quietly, trying to take in the scene.
"Jyuushiro has always had extremely strong spiritual pressure, but even in his academy days his body was never as strong as his spirit." Retsu started to explain, managing to draw some of Shunsui's attention to her as well, "His health was monitored closely, his training strictly controlled. He pushed himself as far as he was allowed, and snuck off to train even more without his professors knowing about it. He was, and still is, a force to be reckoned with on the battlefield, but in pushing himself so hard he took ill. An infection set in, affecting his lungs, and no amount of healing Kido could reverse it. We can keep it relatively managed, but we can't get rid of it. To this day if he is stressed, or trains a little too harshly, he can have a relapse of this illness. That is what happened to him today. He starts coughing and cannot stop, he coughs until there is blood coming from his lungs, and when he can no longer breathe correctly he blacks out.
"Your body is weak right now. Aizen had you exercising I know this, but there is more to health than simple exercise. That collar they used on you drained you of vital life force, to the point if you do not let yourself heal you could end up the next person haunting my barracks for an incurable illness. So please, if you want something you can learn than work on controlling your spirit pressure, but wait to jump back into physical training until Captain Kurotsuchi and myself clear you." Retsu knew Jyuushiro didn't mind being a cautionary tale; he did it to his own squad members if he noticed someone pushing themselves too hard.
"Jyuu was always working, he was far more studious than I was, and he never gave himself a break. He worked himself sick, and he knows it." Shunsui had caught on quickly to why Retsu had brought Ichigo here. "If you want to work on Kido, which helps with control, I can recommend someone to help you. Right now if you want to get stronger, do what you can, and when you heal you will be all the tougher for it."
Ichigo took another long look at the man struggling to breathe on the bed, "All right, I'll back off for awhile. I guess I can try some Kido, maybe I can even get one over on Renji." He submitted.
"Ah, Lieutenant Abarai, quite the hot-head, but no Kido is not his strong point." Shunsui chuckled softly, still low key from Jyuushiro's relapse, "The person you want to talk to is Lieutenant Kira of the third squad. He is the Kido expert around here, and he is closer to your age, might make it easier to learn from him."
"I know him," Ichigo admitted, "I'm not real close to him, but I don't think it would hurt to ask."
Shunsui nodded, "He has a lot on his shoulders right now, so it would be good for him to have something to distract himself with."
"He was Ichimaru's Lieutenant right?" Ichigo got his confirmation at Shunsui's nod, "I bet that isn't easy to deal with."
"No, it isn't." Shunsui agreed.
Retsu interrupted him, "Now that you understand us Ichigo, its time to get you back to bed. It will be a few days before I feel comfortable letting you leave my barracks unsupervised. If you are heading to the thirteenth squad when healed you may as well wait for Jyuushiro to come around. He is usually up and around no more than a week after a relapse, so it would match up pretty closely."
"He won't mind that you told me all this, will he?" Ichigo asked, scrunching up his brow in worry.
"No, he would rather we use him as an example, than see someone else make the same mistakes." Shunsui answered the question, reaching out to gently stroke the back of Jyuushiro's hand.
Ichigo nodded, before letting Retsu herd him back to his room. He settled back on the bed. She turned to leave, but before she left, she spoke, "I know it will be hard to hold back, but it is for your own safety, trust us, we will help you get strong for you, and not just to fight Aizen."
Ichigo looked at her intensely, "I have never wanted to be strong just for myself, it has always been for someone else. Do not take that from me, it is all I have left."
"You are more important than your next mission Ichigo. I hope you see that one day. I know you have been thrown into battle after battle, with little preparation, and not much knowledge, but that changes now. You are one of us, we will watch over you. Now try and rest, if you would like I can ask Lieutenant Kira to stop by when he gets a free moment. We are not going to stop you from learning, we are just going to make sure you are safe while you do it." She explained.
"If you could ask him, please do, I would appreciate it," Ichigo acquiesced, he saw the look in her eyes, he wasn't going to win this round, no matter how much he wanted to.
"I will have him here soon, now rest, you will be back on your feet quicker the more rest you get." She ordered, before leaving him alone with his thoughts.
Things were going to get interesting around here, and it was only his first day awake, what would the next couple of weeks bring?
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Stand in the Rain