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Tag	By : LilMonk Category: Bleach > Het - Male/Female Views: 11404 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 18
- 19
Disclaimers: Bleach is the sole property of Kubo Tite. I
only own this fanfic.

A/N: So I had to borrow some elements from the
previous chapter for this manga tie-in ending. As a way of thanking the reviewers
and for the long wait (Due to plotbunny plague), I wrote 2 chapters, 1 of them
being this ending. As for the other, see bottom of page. And yes, many thanks
for the reviews. It's good to know that this story was so wonderfully received.

Words in Italics denotes
personal thoughts (hence scenes of the past are in this font, as they are being
remembered).

When I use the word �man�, I�m using
it in the context of gender and not (im) mortality.

To make the scenes clearer:

~*~*~*~

Followed
by words in this font---Past.

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

Followed by words mainly in this
font-- Present.

~*~*~*~

The
glass is half...

Did this one have to look like a
granite sourpuss?

That hat was seated exceedingly low on his head so she couldn't see his eyes, but a frown was apparent in the lower half of that face, as his hands deftly applied bandages over the green gunk of medical concoctions...

Tessai and Ururu were looking after
Orihime, Ichigo and Chad while using potent ointments. When the specially
accelerated healing of their injuries was sufficient to be passed off as an
accident from sports, those children would be accompanied back to their homes.

Those invaders were frighteningly powerful. Being able to wreak this much harm without even trying... Nevermind the foul-mouthed arrancar, whose skin had been so dense that her blows did not even do serious damage. It was the other frailer-seeming, smaller arrancar who was truly worrying. Single-handedly destroying Kisuke's shikai-level strike without blinking, relaxed despite facing the possibility of fighting both her and him� the enemy�s soul slayer had not been reached for, not even once.

A particularly hard tug, as he
finished doing up the bandages distracted Yoruichi into glaring at him. What
was he so ornery about? Besides, this alarming development had to be discussed-

"You should have been more careful."

"About what?"

Both hands remained on her left
forearm.

"Kisuke, you know I can't read your
mind, especially when you�re about to throw a tantrum. Careful about what?"

She really had to stop baiting him
out of habit.

"You should have taken her and
avoided the blast."

Why wasn't he being his usual
infuriatingly calm and logical self? Oh wait, he was. Sort of.

"Let's see. Hitting that rude giant
hurt more than expected, and nearly numbed my left arm and leg. Plus I trusted
you to dispel the Cero."

"If I hadn't been in time, you would
have died."

That stung. Even when he was being overly sensitive, the point he made was valid. Irritation vied with guilt at her own complacency and now, worry. It wasn't time for smacking tactics to help her cope
yet. Grabbing him by the shoulders and giving them a mild shaking, leaning
forward until yellow eyes could peek beneath the brim of that dratted hat...
there was something unidentifiable in that unshaven face. It was definitely
more than worry and useless angst, since he was so worked up. And if this man
didn't open up soon, Yoruichi was going to... do something. She just had to
figure out what that would be first.

"Yes, I get your point ALREADY. And stop acting like a sulky fool!"

Seeing a usually merry expression now
replaced by pursed lips and a deep crease between arched eyebrows, along with
unveiled annoyance... such familiar words. Different tone, different meaning,
different time and different place, but his induced sentiment was unchanged.
Anger warred with guilt, as he silently berated himself for Yoruichi's
condition, while remembering something else.

She always roused his protective
instincts --sometimes to the point of overbearing-- leading to exasperation on
both sides. Dwelling on the possibility of how close she had been to dying just
now, was having an unwarranted effect. This current inexplicable feeling was so
strong that it was... confusing. There was a faint parallel though, to the time
she had left for Soul Society to help save Kuchiki-san, with her own goals to
accomplish. Despite knowing those teenagers needed her guidance, he had wanted
to beg her to stop. And convince her he'd been wrong; that unresolved issues
should be left to rot into nothing with time.

And... hold her.

And where had that come from?

Insanity. Hadn't he gotten over those
crazy urges in the last twenty years?

Judging by this moment, apparently
not.

Seeing dusky features smoothen out
into puzzled concern, and how gentle her grip had become... reminded Kisuke of
another.

One who had previously been
reencountered during an afternoon of intense meditation a few weeks back,
whereby he had somehow retreated into a queer state of being neither asleep nor
awake...

~*~*~*~

(1)Drapes.

Long strips of gossamer billowing
from a ceiling of unending darkness, there was a breeze that seemed to be
playing hide-and-seek with him. And where did this undetectable source of light
come from, wreaking havoc with the shadows to create faint phantasms that snuck
around like wisps of doubtful imagination?

His lungs felt constricted though,
on seeing a lone puddle of distant darkness that didn't move, and was larger
than the rest. Making his way towards it, so quiet that it would be nigh
impossible to hear him-

And there was impossibility.

No braids this time, but hair
still artfully twisted up with rose-coloured paper, tattered floor-length robes
a subdued fuchsia while seated on the ground, holding a scroll and brush� she
turned her head.

The silence seemed to stretch on
forever.

Stepping around, dropping to his
knees so he wouldn't tower over her petite form, it didn�t reduce seemingly
quizzical innocence. Or the strange expression that flitted across her face, on
seeing him doing so.

�Kisuke��

"Benihime..."

"What are you doing here?"

That last question came out at the
same time, causing both to start laughing.

She answered first.

"This is the border where
conscious and subconscious meet, hidden deep within your soul... where else would
I be?"

He didn't know how to reply but
before he could, she returned to her task.

�A zanpaku-tou's soul prevails as
long as its owner. Suspended between life and death, I'm not real... compared to
her."

Glancing at the parchment she was
working on, he saw a female whose back was turned. Trees, flowers, birds, a
river, and the night sky was studded with stars; a wine flask lay toppled on
its side and was quite unlike a gleaming white tower in the distance... The
message had never been clearer.

"For the sake of submission, I
killed you once. Are you asking me to do it again?"

Stubborn fixation on her drawing
was starting to become annoying.

"No. I'm asking you to end your
stubborn loneliness."

Why wouldn't she look at him?

"And who will end yours?"

The brush was still.

"Please leave."

Odd break in her tone on the last
word gave it away.

Forcibly restraining a small chin
even as she started to move backwards, tilting it up revealed averted eyes
gleaming like wet autumn leaves. And the sight undid a secret he'd buried for
so long, dissolving the lock.

One arm slipping behind her back,
he leaned forward. Only for a spread-eagled hand to separate their faces,
extensively sharp nails like the bars of a prison.

"I stabbed you before... go away!"

Sliding his fingers between hers
to close over a skeletal-thin hand, the barrier was lowered.

"And I remain unafraid. Because I
knew you... I..."

His free hand slid up to tug out
stiff paper, letting long black hair fall loose. Bloodless features now
contorted as if in pain, pale lips parted but nothing came out. Her Kisuke
didn�t understand. If the unthinkable was true... even then, it should not be
allowed to fully materialise. Besides, there was no future. Nevermind her own
selfish dreams; he deserved better, before this became irreversible.

Then why wasn't she clawing some
sense into him, instead of waiting for him to advance closer?

"D-don't be foolish."

Forgetting to exhale, she stared
at her fear.

"Enlighten me."

Then his lips were pressed against
hers.

Both sides didn�t move.

His hand was so warm; thumb
stroking the curve of her left ear while the other fingers cupped her neck.

Eyes still unblinkingly open, the
sensation of his mouth on bare skin was� Closing her eyes and allowing her head
to fall further to one side to rest against firm support, her left hand holding
the scroll lay limp against the ground.

And when he stopped, she didn't
like it.

So she kissed him back.

Interlaced fingers brought to one
side, unsuppressed exploration found the openings to each other's clothing,
all this only heightened their absorption in each other, one thing descending
into another...

It was only a matter of time
before the drawing was forgotten.

~*~*~*~

Unfortunately, he couldn't forget
what his Benihime had asked of him, after that period of indescribable
contentment. Part of that request was now almost too near for comfort... and
something else.

Eyes hooded and that stony silence'''
she wished he would say something. Yoruichi hated it when she couldn't
recognise his mood and right now, he was definitely incomprehensible.

But being this close to him� so
temptingly close that if she fully stretched her tongue, she could lick his
lips, only brought up issues that she had hoped were fully resolved after
returning from Soul Society this time round.

Judging by this moment, apparently
not.

So much for being older, wiser... and
more decisive.

Mulish perplexity... had he ever been
like this with her?

Remembering the phantom she hadn't
thought about in decades, plus associated feelings that had started everything
similar to that of a "Gordian knot", it wasn't good. It was like regressing
back to the days of silly covetousness where Kisuke was concerned. Wanting
something you probably couldn't have.

His 'rival' was real, but how could
she compete with a ghost... of himself?

~*~*~*~

"So
what, if I did surpass the limitations of a normal shinigami?"

"That means you can become two
assholes at once!"

Watching the blond-haired man
retreat backwards, hearing guffaws that reminded one of huge bales of hay
rolling down a hill, and seeing the zanpaku-tou�s spirit give sufficient pause
before re-engaging him in their duel once more� it wasn't fair.

It had taken Yoruichi months to
elicit that rareness, and years to ensure its continuity without his walled
pretences, yet all that was easily achieved by this one in two days. Pure, unadulterated
humour that was honest, and totally without false gaiety Kisuke was only too
naturally talented at faking, even with others when necessary. Aware that her
jaw muscles were clenched at seeing them exchange those little smiles, for the...
She'd stop counting after the tenth time.

And since when had those two
agreed to progress into brief and pointless banter, when the danger of this
experiment to her best friend increased with time?

When Benihime skewered him with
her nails, the shock was agonising.

No. Kisuke wouldn't be so
careless. He-

It had been gleefully satisfying
to see him lop off that skinny spirit�s arm.

But was spoiled by realising he
was about to run over and possibly- Shouting at him to stop was barely
effective. She had to end day two now. But that look on his face... on seeing his
enemy stagger backwards while clutching at a cleanly shorn stump� Two different
types of expressed pain that were somehow similar.

And Yoruichi was discovering new
emotions in ascending intensity. From uneasiness to loathing, rising to
resentment and an oddly burning bitterness, and eventually falling into... Being
around Kisuke (unless necessary) was too much antagonism to be endured, during
this period of achieving bankai.

It had been a relief, to see him
fatally impale his opponent with true strength that had been located and
established. Multiple duplicates of enemy and tool vanished.

Then it had turned into a newly discovered
nightmare of sorts.

Seeing a kneeling man clasp the
faltering thing so... So. So- kindly, the gentle manner in which dangerous nails
touched his cheek, the slowness with which his hand slipped beneath the back of
her head... and the swiftness with which he tenderly kissed a willing girl.

Hand pressed tightly over her
mouth, Yoruichi couldn't bring herself to look away. Like a sucker for
punishment, when she herself didn't know what her crime was... And it hurt. Hurt
beyond imagination, as if someone had sentenced her nerves to a second preserved in eternity of being dipped into boiling oil.

Seeing him smile strangely as he
finally stood up holding the Tenshintai- Socking Urahara Kisuke had prevented
the tears, until she had run off far enough to let them fall.

Despite being repressed, this
unforgivable memory lingered, like a festering wound. Lurking and tainting the
hidden recesses of her heart, niggling agony eventually spilling over to
certain perceptions of the world around her� She didn�t know how to define it.
But she definitely wanted it gone. So she began to explore, searching for a
remedy in others. Many years later, Shihouin Yoruichi unwittingly chanced upon
a possible cure. And certified it within the last visit to Soul Society.

However, why couldn't she be sure
enough to cement its permanence?

~*~*~*~

"Kisuke..."

It came out as a croak, as she stared
at eyes that did not leave hers now.

His expression had softened, an
unusual glint in those darkening pupils and lips quirking slightly.

From then onwards, it felt like
reality in a dream. Slow. Unstoppable. Indescribable.

Eyes closing. Lips touching. Tasting.
Chaste, yet hoping, yearning to go further-

It was impossible to tell who pulled
away first.

Staring at each other, raw emotions were so painfully exposed for interpretation... but resultant chaos from the kiss was enough to guarantee that neither side trusted their judgement enough at this point to even try and draw a reliable conclusion. Not with the ghosts that haunted them, one of the most threatening phantoms being uncertainty.

One hand adjusting his hat back to
its normal position once more, he stood up.

Not daring to glance down, too
unsettled by everything that had happened today, especially in the last five
minutes, Urahara Kisuke needed space to calm down, and think, and, er... try to
figure out how he was going to look her in the eye the next day. Or at least
someday. He cleared his throat loudly. VERY loudly.

"Rest. When you've recovered
sufficiently, we'll talk about this. The fight. I'm going to ah, check up on
our patients to see if they are ready to go home!"

Benihime, I tried as you said. And
now I know. I know that...

He left, hastily pulling the sliding
door shut.

Muted from the aftermath of being
thoroughly obfuscated, Shihouin Yoruichi buried her face in both hands. The
next idiot who told her that 'being older meant wiser' was going to get booted
into the nearest dustbin.

Complicated. Confused. Cranky.
Perfect ending to a perfect day. If everything was thrown into a baby's rattle
and fiercely shaken.

She wanted to know.

He wanted to know.

Nothing was clear at this point, when
definition was so sorely needed. And the only thing that stood out at this
point was not helping.

Can't I have both?

Who said life never resembled a
manga?

Fin

A/N:
(1) denotes a
separate spin-off for the memories of Kisuke and Benihime. If you wish to read
and are mature enough to access it as with the previous 2 censored chapters, go
to the 'Skerries of Dreaming' link in my profile and follow the bunny hole
titled "Man and Sword as One."

13/10/2005: If this story does move up the list from time to time, it's only because there's little changes that need to be made in-chapter, as the anime comes out with the colour of certain characters' reiatsu, what with all the upcoming battles. Otherwise...

And
nickel, you are more than welcome to stop by my onsen (hot springs otherwise
known as the LJ) for a chat. :D
- 18
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