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The Heart in My Hand	By : chayron Category: Bleach > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 10028 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. It belongs to its respective owners. This fan fiction is not a commercial project, and I am not making any money from writing it.

Chapter List
- 1-Part 1
- 2-Part 2
- 3-Part 3
- 4-Part 4
- 5-Part 5
- 6-Part 6
- 7-Part 7
- 8-Part 8
- 9-Part 9
- 10-Part 10
- 11-Part 11
- 12-Part 12
- 13-Part 13
- 14-Part 14
- 15-Part 15
- 16-Part 16
- 17-Part 17
- 18-Part 18
- 19-Part 19
- 20-Part 20
- 21-Part 21
- 22-Part 22
- 23-Part 23
- 24-Part 24
- 25-Part 25
- 26-Part 26
- 27-Part 27
- 17
- 18
- 19
Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach – it belongs to its respective owners. This fan fiction is not a commercial project, and I am not making any money from writing it.
Warnings:
1. Yaoi (male x male). Ulquiorra x Ichigo and vice versa. Other pairings?
2. Ichigo – almost 19 years old; Ulquiorra – probably a few hundred as a Hollow and about a decade or so as an Arrancar?
3. Post anime (haven’t read the manga).
4. Alternate Universe.
5. I’m not a native speaker, thus expect various language oddities.
6. I’m not very familiar with all the details in the anime, and I am also new to Bleach fandom, so I will be straying away from the canon quite frequently. I do my research but Bleach is a vast universe that is not so easy to grasp. I must admit, though, that there are also things in the anime that don’t make sense to me and I take the liberty of recreating certain parts of this universe as I see fit.
The Heart in My Hand
by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash
Part 18
“We need to avoid the main gate,” Ulquiorra said, pointing at a crudely drawn map. He and Ichigo were in the red-head’s room, standing at the desk. It had taken Ichigo half a day to draw Seireitei’s map from memory. In the end, it had appeared that Ulquiorra was even more knowledgeable of its layout than the red-head. It was no wonder considering that this was the second time Ulquiorra was considering its invasion; Aizen had ordered every Arrancar to familiarize themselves with Seireitei’s plan.
“The main gate is no problem,” Ichigo said, shaking his head. “As long as it’s dark and you suppress your reiatsu, I can get you past – they’ll open it for me. And if it’s already open, we can just flash-step past it. The guard won’t able to detect you. That’s how I got you out of Seireitei unnoticed in the first place.”
Ulquiorra stared at him for a few seconds. “Now I see why Aizen thought it would be easy to gain entrance. Why do they even have those incompetent guards at the gate?”
“So that we could get inside,” Ichigo replied, not wishing to start a discussion about how Soul Society had never been ready to face enemies of such caliber as Arrancars. He drew his finger over the line that was supposed to be a wall encircling the Twelfth Division premises. “Now, once we’re inside, we need to get past this wall. The gate will be guarded, so…”
“We kill the guards and go inside.”
“Which part of ‘no one has to die’ don’t you understand? Besides, they’ll shout for help.”
“Oh, right. Then we kill them quietly.”
“No, you can’t ki-” Ichigo trailed off at the amused look on Ulquiorra’s face. The other man was teasing him. “Concentrate.”
“I am fully concentrated,” Ulquiorra assured him.
“You can’t kill even if you’re attacked,” Ichigo insisted.
“Well, that depends on-”
“No!”
“Well, I suppose I can just cut off their arms and legs.”
“No, you can’t!”
Ulquiorra glared at him. “Then what in the world am I supposed to do?”
“And no Cero.”
“I regret ever telling you about this,” Ulquiorra informed the red-head angrily. “I don’t want this to be a suicidal mission. If you want to die, you can go and die alone.”
“If we do this right, no one has to die.”
“How do you imagine we can pull this through without any victims?”
“Well, we just…”
“Ichigo, dinner’s ready!”
The mood brightened at the prospect of food. Ichigo folded the map, stored it in the drawer and, leaving the discussion for later, the two of them went downstairs.
In the kitchen, Orihime was helping set the plates. Kon’s plushy feet were rearranging themselves hurriedly as he followed Orihime to and fro. He was gushing about something to her excitedly. When Orihime nearly tripped over him, she lifted him and seated onto a chair at the table. At the sight of Ulquiorra, she went to the fridge to get a plate of raw Hollow meat. She set it onto the cupboard near the stove and went to sit at the table with the others.
By the time Ulquiorra finished frying the meat, everyone else was almost done with dinner. Yet, sipping their teas and coffees, they waited for him to join them at the table. Isshin, though, excused himself and went to close up the clinic.
Orihime watched Ulquiorra eat. It was always either meat or buns. She didn’t think she had ever seen him eat anything else. An occasional cup of tea, maybe. Did he even know what other food tasted like?
“Why don’t we go get some ice-cream, Ulquiorra?” she suggested. “There’s a stall nearby.”
Ulquiorra’s jaws stopped working for a moment while he stared at her, then he nodded. “We can.”
The table had turned quiet at Orihime’s question, but now the surprised silence had transformed into astonishment. Orihime, though, looked content – no matter what, this counted as a date. Ichigo wondered what exactly Ulquiorra was doing. Kon had already complained to the read-head about Ulquiorra’s audacity and his threats. Ichigo hadn’t paid them much attention since he was perfectly familiar with Kon’s tendency of getting on anyone’s nerves. Yet, it seemed that Ulquiorra might have been serious about his threat. Or maybe he wanted to have some fun while making him jealous. Both of them, him and Kon.
“What is ‘ice-cream’?” Ulquiorra asked the red-head softly as Orihime left the table to put her empty plates in the sink.
Or that.
Ichigo felt like facepalming. “It’s basically frozen milk and sugar.”
“So it’s Human food,” Ulquiorra summed. He grimaced. “I can’t eat that.”
Ichigo shrugged. “What did you think it was?”
Now it was Ulquiorra’s turn to shrug. “A bag of sand? A sack of asphalt? Something heavy she couldn’t get alone from a store?”
“You have a date now,” Ichigo informed him quietly. “Eating ice-cream together.”
“A date?” Ulquiorra repeated uncertainly. He was familiar with the particular meaning of the word and it made him grin at Kon. “Take that. And I haven’t even been trying.”
Ichigo was just in time to grab Kon by his plushy feet in midair. “You… Be quiet!” Ichigo hissed at Ulquiorra while struggling to stop Kon from trying to get his paws on the other man.
“Wow,” Karin said, watching the scene over the top of her mug. “That’s quite some love triangle! You can’t even find this much drama on TV nowadays.”
“It’s a trapezoid,” Yuzu corrected her.
“Why a trapezoid?” Karin asked.
“Well, there are four of them and with different relations to each other, so the sides are of different length.”
“You’ve been doing too much math,” Ichigo told her. “Go and rest.”
“A trapezoid,” Ulquiorra repeated. “She does have a point there.”
“Don’t you start,” Ichigo grunted irritably.
- - -
Ichigo hid behind a lamp post. He took a careful peek from behind it at a small café further away from him. Ulquiorra and Orihime had just disappeared into it. It was evening, almost dark already.
“What are they doing?” Kon whispered worriedly. He had scaled Ichigo and was now on his head. Unlike he had believed, though, the height had not helped at all; Kon was having trouble keeping his balance as his plushy feet kept slipping off the smooth hair.
“They just went in,” Ichigo grunted, trying to see through the reflections in the windows. “They’re looking for a place to sit.” He squinted at the specular windows. Just before Ulquiorra had left with Orihime on this sporadic date, the bastard had had the nerve to goof around in front of the mirror theatrically and ask whether he looked good. Ulquiorra was enjoying this too much.
Damn him.
Trying to see inside, Ichigo squinted more. And the bastard did look good, too. He probably knew that as well. Ichigo found Ulquiorra’s looks unusual, rather exotic. Without the horn, he appeared more Human-like. The impression was deceptive, but Ichigo found Ulquiorra’s current appearance more appealing.
“What are they doing now?”
Ichigo rolled his eyes. “Well, what can they do at a café? Eat.”
“Is he touching her?”
“I don’t think he’d touch her even if she begged him to,” Ichigo muttered. From the way Ulquiorra reacted around Orihime, Ichigo was under the impression that Ulquiorra was barely aware of her existence. There was some strange lethargic apathy he could sense from Ulquiorra.
“You’re too naïve!” the bear accused. “Too careless!”
“Gah!” Ichigo grunted as Kon nearly fell off and started pulling at his hair, trying to clamber back on top of his head. “Get off me!” He hushed as the door opened and Ulquiorra appeared with Orihime. “Shh!”
Kon finally managed to firmly attach himself to Ichigo’s head and now lay still. His buttony eye snuck a peek from behind the lamp post. Orihime and Ulquiorra were seating themselves outside the café at one of the free tables. There were no other customers outside. It made sense – no one else was able to see Ulquiorra, it would have looked strange if Orihime talked to herself alone at a table inside a full hall.
Interested, Ichigo watched the scene in front of him. Orihime immediately delved into the menu while Ulquiorra appeared to be very interested in the tented umbrella above their heads. Orihime lowered the menu and pointed at something in it. Ulquiorra looked at it and shrugged. Obviously, Ulquiorra wasn’t well-versed in courtship. He just sat there at the table. He didn’t even have the money to treat Orihime. That was actually Ichigo’s fault and the red-head felt guilty.
“I should have given him some money.”
“You’re a freaking idiot!” Kon informed Ichigo, hitting him on the head. “You’re a moron! Do you really want him to win her over? Moron!”
“Stop hitting me! It hurts!” the red-head hissed.
In a couple of minutes, a waitress appeared with two dishes of ice-cream. She lowered the two bowls in front of Orihime, asked her something, took the menu and left.
“Does he actually know what ice-cream is?” Kon wondered, when Ulquiorra kept staring at the bowl of pink and yellow ice-cream in front of him. Ulquiorra took a spoon then lifted his head. He watched Orihime eating hers, the pink tongue and pearly-white teeth darting out to scoop the sweet-smelling mass off the spoon.
Obviously, Ulquiorra was in a dilemma. Then he turned and shifted and, somehow, his ice-cream hit the ground. Ichigo was impressed with the masterful acting – one would never tell that it had been done intentionally. Yet, he had to laugh at the look of sheer annoyance on Ulquiorra’s face when Orihime sprung up and ran back into the shop to buy him a new one.
Ulquiorra stared at the ice-cream on the floor, picked it up, and tossed into the trashcan, causing a few passersby to freak out and stare at the can. Then he turned around and started heading right in Ichigo’s direction. Shushing Kon, Ichigo hid behind the post as best as he could, but Ulquiorra materialized right in front of him. Without explanation, he grabbed Ichigo by the shoulder and, heeding no protests, dragged him towards the table. To avoid any open mouths or stares, Ichigo stopped squirming and tried to walk as naturally as he could while carrying a plush bear under his arm.
Orihime left the shop with a new bowl of ice-cream. She was surprised to see Ichigo and Kon at the table.
“Um, what a pleasant coincidence!” Kon chirped. “We were out shopping for tomorrow’s breakfast! And then we saw Ulquiorra here!”
Neither Ichigo nor Ulquiorra even attempted to support this load of drivel. Orihime nodded and held the bowl out for Ulquiorra, smiling. He took it and pushed it over to Ichigo.
“He looks hungry,” he explained to Orihime’s questioning look. He looked proud of his plan and Ichigo snorted.
“You’re so thoughtful,” Orihime gushed. “Always thinking about others first.”
“Yes, and since I am so thoughtful, Ichigo will pay for it,” Ulquiorra told the red-head, pointing at the bowl. “For the one I dropped as well.”
Ichigo muttered something under his breath, but lacked the will to voice it clearly and, instead, scooped up some ice-cream to cool off his annoyance.
ooOoOoOoo
It was past two in the morning when Ichigo and Ulquiorra reached the premises of the Twelfth Division. Everything was going according to plan – the main gate to Seireitei had been open and they had snuck past it unnoticed. They had also been lucky enough to stay undetected since most residents in Seireitei were sleeping. The streets were empty and dark; very few lights glinted in the windows.
Crouching on a nearby roof, Ichigo and Ulquiorra watched two idling guards at the gate. The torches above their heads illuminated the door and a few meters in front of it. Unlike Ichigo had imagined, the distance from the roof and the wall appeared to be too far for a jump. Flash-stepping from the roof and over the wall might cause the guards to feel or notice their growing reiatsu. They couldn’t see what was happening behind the wall either, but it was clear there would be several guards on the other side of the gate. If they didn’t want to confront the watch, they had to abstain from the main entrance, look around, and try the walls on either the left or right side further down the street.
Ulquiorra had obviously reached the same conclusion as he had started moving to the right. They jumped over a few more roofs until the main gate was out of sight. The red-head quickly looked around and was relieved to see that the street was still empty and quiet. Ichigo’s heart was beating madly in his ears and he had to listen more carefully to ensure himself that it was really silent all around. He still couldn’t believe that they were really doing this. They had discussed it all, but there was still a very strong sense of incredulity, as if all of this wasn’t happening to him.
Ichigo and Ulquiorra landed in the middle of the street then jumped onto the wall. From up there, the dark shapes and outlines of the Twelfth Division barracks unclosed in front of them. It was half-light near the wall, while it was much darker further down between the barracks, only an occasional torch lighting the surroundings.
Ichigo could feel a few Shinigami moving about, but he wasn’t able to tell their exact location. A slight movement caught his eye and he realized Ulquiorra was already down on the ground, moving quickly until he reached the closest barracks building. Ichigo followed him and pressed his back to the barracks’ wall. They quickly inched along it to its end, and Ulquiorra peered out from behind the corner. Shinigami Research and Development Institute was right in front of him, across the well-lit yard. The entrance to it, though, was on the other side, to their left.
Unnoticed, they dashed from one barracks to another until they appeared in front of the entrance to the institute. The research building seemed far away – across the wide yard and up the stairs. There were two patrols dozing at the entrance. Ichigo guessed that there were also guards inside to make sure the secrets of the institute never reached the outer world. During his previous visits to the Twelfth Division, Ichigo had never noticed this many guards, meaning they had tightened security after Ulquiorra’s escape. There was, however, no other way to get inside.

Ichigo and Ulquiorra met each other’s eyes and dashed forward, leaving the safety of the barracks wall. Already half-way across the yard, it was obvious that no matter how fast they moved, it was impossible to stay unnoticed. There was no way back, either. The guards at the door stirred and Ichigo heard Ulquiorra unsheathe his Zanpakuto. Ichigo reached for his own weapon and his stomach sank at the thought of a fight; he had hoped so much that they would manage to avoid this.
They were nearly at the top of the stairs leading into the building when an explosion shook the ground and a blast of air tossed them away from the building. Turning in midair, Ichigo landed on his feet and raised his head to see what had happened. Instead of Shinigami Research and Development Institute, he saw a smoking hole filled with debris surrounded by what was left of the walls. He turned to look at Ulquiorra, who was crouching next to him.
“Why are you looking at me?” the other man said after noticing the stare. “I didn’t do anything.”
With a grunt, Ichigo turned back to the ruins. The fire in the ruins was illuminating the whole square now, shapes and shadows dancing around. The smoke started clearing away and he saw two obscure figures walking through the debris. The explosion had woken up everyone in the division and probably all of Seireitei. Shinigami were filing out of their barracks and rushing to the yard. Familiar reiatsu was spiking here and there.
The crowd scattered to the sides when a red Cero flashed through the air and imbedded itself into the white tiles the Shinigami had just been standing on. The ground exploded, filling the air with even more dust and smoke. Despite the general confusion, the Shinigami singled out the two figures in the ruins of the institute and counterattacked. They didn’t get far as a few more Ceros met them. A few barracks rose into the air and, their formation scattering, the Twelfth Division retreated.
The enemies were Arrancars. Ichigo could see them clearly now amongst the glow of Ceros. He held out his Zanpakuto and went for Bankai at once, donning his mask. When closing in, he took note that one of the Arrancars looked like a distant relative of Ulquiorra’s– albeit with a completely different face and a much larger body, he had the same mask that Ulquiorra used to have. The second one seemed to be familiar as well, but the red-head couldn’t put his finger on it.
Ichigo was met with a raised Zanpakuto and blades clashed, sparks flying around them. Metal screeched against metal as Ichigo pushed the Arrancar back. From up close, he seemed to resemble Ulquiorra even more – bright emerald eyes staring at him unblinkingly.
The red-head shoved the Arrancar back, making him stumble. Something glinted on his right and Ichigo was just in time to deflect a second Zanpakuto aiming for his neck. Fighting two Arrancars at once was going to be troublesome and Ichigo doubted that he could hold out for long. Ulquiorra had stayed back, having chosen not to interfere, so he was alone in this. He had to wait for the captains to show up.
Ichigo jumped sideways to avoid the Zanpakuto. The blade whooshed past him, barely missing his side. The other Arrancar was behind him already, and Ichigo turned to block the incoming Zanpakuto. At this rate, there was no thought about going on offensive – he was barely keeping up with them. The Arrancars also had superior vision to his, and the half-light wasn’t a hindrance to them.
Ichigo grunted as one of the Arrancars pushed him back. The red-head staggered, trying to regain his balance, and the other Arrancar used the opportunity to slash at him. Half-falling and half-hopping, Ichigo tried to raise Zangetsu to deflect the hit. Before he could, though, the Arrancar’s arm separated from his shoulder and fell to the ground, his Zanpakuto hitting the tiles with a clang. Ulquiorra stepped on it and kicked out with his other foot, sending the injured Arrancar sprawling onto his back. His arm, though, was already regenerating.
Ichigo concentrated on his opponent, who was now aiming a Cero at him. The red-head didn’t manage to suppress it and it flew at him at high-speed. He deflected the Cero with Zangetsu, sending the blast towards the sky where it hit the domed shield and ricocheted back to the ground, hitting a building far away. The ground shook under his feet and Ichigo swayed lightly, his Zanpakuto missing his opponent by a few centimeters. He could sense a few powerful reiatsu heading towards the Twelfth Division, or at least to what was left of it.
Ichigo felt Ulquiorra’s reiatsu shift and knew the other was now in his second form. He could hear the familiar hum of a Cero behind him, and soon everything was swallowed by a blinding green light.
Unlike most other Arrancars, these two weren’t talkative while fighting. Maybe that was why it was so difficult to kill them. Even though the Arrancar wasn’t able to overpower him, all of Ichigo’s attacks were beaten off. The red-head had the confidence that he could win – he was stronger and he still had time until his Hollow mask disappeared. The problem was that the Arrancar was a capable swordsman and he was perfectly able to compensate the lack of reiatsu with his skill. In fact, the green Zanpakuto seemed to be getting faster and more lethal every second. The Arrancar was grinning all the while, unnerving Ichigo. A few Shinigami tried to help the red-head fight, but the sheer force the Arrancar was emanating sent them all flying away.
“Don’t look at his Zanpakuto!” someone shouted. “It’s his ability – he’s pulling you into his pace and slowing you down!”
Only then did Ichigo notice that he had, in fact, not been looking at anything but the Arrancar’s blade. Even after hearing the warning, looking away from the Zanpakuto appeared to be an impossible task. The gleaming, green blade was hypnotizing. Ichigo couldn’t take his eyes off it; he could feel his movements slowing down. Soon the Arrancar began pushing him back, Ichigo hardly managing to beat off his insistent attacks. Adrenaline was coursing through his body and the only thoughts in Ichigo’s head were how to predict the next move, then the next, then the next. It was all about survival now.
And suddenly a green spear imbedded itself in the middle of the Arrancar’s chest. The Arrancar stared at the tip protruding from his body in surprise. He tried to slide off it, but Ulquiorra lifted his spear and slammed it back down, lodging it into the ground together with the skewered Arrancar. Even if impaled, he was still moving, his hand clutching his Zanpakuto, trying to reach and cut someone, anyone. Then Byakuya appeared seemingly from nowhere, set his foot down onto the blade, crushing it, and his Senbonzakura sliced through the neck of the speared Arrancar. The separated head rolled up to Ichigo’s foot, its mouth still grinning, then started fading away in a puff of black smoke.
Panting, Ichigo dropped to the ground and raised his eyes to look further down the yard. It seemed that the chaos was over: Renji was standing above the other Arrancar, brandishing his sword at his neck while Toshiro was trying to pull him away. The Arrancar seemed to be rendered motionless, his wrists and feet frozen in ice. It seemed like it was dead already.
“Are you alright, Ichigo?” Byakuya asked him while giving an askance look to Ulquiorra, who tugged at his spear, freeing it from the ground.
Then it all suddenly came back to Ichigo, the reason why he was here and the entire plan. He, though, still had his Hollow mask on and it was pretty dark. He jumped to his feet.
“Who is this Ichigo you’re talking about?” he squealed out like a five-year-old girl, thinking frantically that maybe there was a chance he could find a bag lying around to cover his head. “I’m new here and h-”
Ulquiorra rolled his eyes. “Stop it, you idiot,” he grunted, smacking Ichigo over the head. “You’re making a fool of yourself.”
With some hesitation, Ichigo dispersed his mask. Ulquiorra turned to stare at the burning ruins of the institute. He had a feeling that everything had gone much better than he or Ichigo could have imagined even in their wildest dreams. He turned back to Byakuya and Ichigo. The Shinigami were gathering around them already. Since he obviously looked and felt more like an Arrancar than a Shinigami, they were giving him mistrustful glances, and he dispersed his spear to show that he meant no harm. He did stay in his first form, just in case.
“Ulquiorra Cifer, right?” Byakuya stated, sheathing his Zanpakuto as well.
Ulquiorra nodded. Seeing as it was all over, Ichigo dropped from Bankai. He could sense more captains rushing towards the Twelfth Division, but his head felt completely empty. It was if he had suddenly lost the ability to think and reason. Thoughts didn’t take any substance, no explanations or excuses even started to take shape.
There was a swish of air and Mayuri Kurotsuchi materialized in front of the ruins of his institute.
“No! No!” he screamed in horror, throwing his arms apart. “My research! My samples! No! Impossible! No!”
Ulquiorra was tense, his fingers gripping the handle of his Zanpakuto. Ichigo lowered his hand onto his to make sure he didn’t draw the blade. Dazed, the red-head stared at the wailing captain’s back. He nearly stepped away in surprise when Mayuri turned around. Ichigo stared at the captain’s face. It was covered with slices of cucumbers and some thick white mass; he must have come right from his Magical Clinic.
Then, amongst the slices of cucumbers, the captain’s burning eyes concentrated on Ulquiorra.
“You!” he hissed, drawing his Zanpakuto. “What did you do to my institute?!”
Trying to shake off Ichigo’s hand, Ulquiorra gave him an annoyed look. “I never touched it. I wish I had, though. It exploded so beautifully…”
Ichigo nudged his side, and, glaring, Ulquiorra closed his mouth. Mayuri was approaching them and Ulquiorra shook at Ichigo’s hand again, trying to pull out his Zanpakuto.
“Let go.”
“You’re going to pay for this,” Mayuri promised Ulquiorra, his reiatsu rising. “You’ve got a lot of nerve coming back he-”
“He helped to defeat those Arrancars,” Renji said, uncertain of the situation. Byakuya was just standing near Ichigo silently, listening, and the lieutenant didn’t know whether he was supposed to intervene or not.
“Nonsense!” Mayuri spat. “He planned everything! Why would he be here otherwise?”
“It exploded,” Ichigo said. “Whoosh and into the sky.” He illustrated with his free hand, throwing it into the air, trying to encompass the enormity of the blast. “We never touched it.”
“You blasted it with a Cero!” Mayuri accused Ulquiorra. “My institute! You ingrate bastard, you… How dare you?! I made you!”
“That’s utter drivel,” Ulquiorra informed him. “You never made me.”
“How dare you?! I will m-”
Having had enough, Byakuya motioned at Ulquiorra. “Seize this man,” he ordered Renji.
“Why? He didn’t do anything!” Ichigo protested. “In fact, he…” He trailed off at the cold look on Byakuya’s face.
“He’s former Espada,” Byakuya said, “a part of Aizen’s Arrancar Army and he will be tried by Central 46 for his crimes against Soul Soc-”
“Who is Aizen?” Ulquiorra asked, drawing everyone’s stunned eyes to himself.
The shocked, encompassing silence was only disturbed by the soft flop of cucumbers that had peeled off Mayuri’s face in surprise and fell to the ground.
TBC
- 17
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The Heart in My Hand