The Wolf and the Demon | By : Zarakiswolf Category: Bleach > AU - Alternate Universe Views: 2172 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: Bleach and it's characters (except my OC's) are owned by Tite Kubo. THIS IS NOT FOR PROFIT. I MAKE NO MONEY FROM THIS. |
he clang of steel on steel. Blood in the air. Death surrounds me. Yamamoto stands beside me on the battle field. The Quincies we are marching against are putting up a good fight, though not good enough. Their numbers are slowly dwindling. My ten year old self, only 6 months free of my father's reign of terror, looks on with no emotion.
"You are very quiet today, child. More so than usual." he comments suddenly.
"Why must we kill?"
"We must keep a balance. If too many Hollows are destroyed, our world and the world of the living will merge and collapse. Quincies cannot help but kill Hollows. They are humans who were born with powers to avenge their fallen. However, the blade of a Shinigami like you and I, cleanses the Hollow's soul so that it may enter the Soul Society to keep the balance. Quincies do not understand this and believe Hollow's should not rest in peace."
"Why should any soul rest in peace? We are all evil in some degree or another."
"Does evil not create good in some ways?"
I hesitate. "I don't think so."
"Think for a moment. The flames of my Ryuujin Jakka burn everything, yes?"
"Of course."
"Then from the standpoint of wood, wouldn't my sword be evil?"
"Wood doesn't have a brain though."
"You take things too literal."
I frown. "Yes. The wood would think it's evil, I'm sure. Just as the ant things the boot is evil."
"Very good. But from the ashes rises new life. Remember the field I took you to for training last week?"
"Yes. The ground was nearly bare."
"Because I use that field to train. My sword has burned everything away...however, did you not notice the flowers blooming?"
"Yes, I noticed them. Lavender flowers make me sneeze."
"So is Ryuujin Jakka evil?"
"I don't view a sword as good or evil, sir. It can only do as much as it's partner lets it."
"Do you believe I am evil then? For burning away the grass?"
"I don't know, sir."
"Is your father evil for carrying out the orders I gave him to abuse you?"
"Again, the sword is only as good as it's master."
He nods. "Do you hate me?"
"I hate everything, sir. That is how you wanted me to be. Isn't it?"
"Not exactly."
"I'm tired of living, sir. At ten years old, I already wish I'd never been born. Do you know what comforts me now, when sleep evades me?"
"Hmm?"
"Pain. I have come to associate pain with good things. Fights bring pain. They end pain too. There are times when I hurt myself to keep myself from crying in despair. No child should be like me, sir. One day, I will have to be killed. I already feel the madness creeping in. An overwhelming urge to kill. I want to destroy everything so my pain becomes everyone else's."
"I would suggest you don't give in to this madness. I will be ordered to put you in the Muken until such time as you are needed instead of killing you."
"I won't go quietly, sir. I will force you to kill me."
****Kenpachi POV****
I'm sittin' in Shunsui's office, mullin' over what Wolf said in her sleep. Pain is her way to not cry? That makes my heart bleed a little. I've caught her several times diggin' her nails in her arms, mostly when she's asleep, the blood oozin' out of the wounds.
"Hey, you ok?" Shunsui asks suddenly.
"Yeah. She talks in her sleep and I was thinkin' about somethin' she said last night. It's nothin' important, just girl shit."
"But yet it's distracting you from our drinking game."
I chuckle. "Heaven forbid we get distracted from drinkin'."
"So how is she really? When she came in here two days ago to ask for a transfer she seemed panicked."
"She's afraid of love. To the point of when I first told her she yelled at me and punched me then came runnin' to you. Her childhood musta been really bad if she's that afraid."
"You have no idea. Has she told you any of it?"
"A few things. Makes me sick that anyone can do that."
"Yeah...it was a nightmare. For all of us who cared."
"She's damaged pretty damn bad. Mentally and emotionally."
"Honestly, Kenpachi, I'm really not thrilled about you marrying her. She deserves someone who can help her get past it."
"What makes you think I can't?"
"I'm not saying you can't. I'm thinking you don't have the patience for it."
"I waited two years for her to come out of her wolf form. If that doesn't prove my patience, I don't know what does."
"Just...treat her better than he did, ok? Please."
"I'm tryin'. She's so scared of this she's havin' a lot of bad dreams lately."
"She, of all people, has plenty of reasons to have bad dreams, Kenpachi."
"I know it. I hold her and talk to her when she wakes up screamin'."
He sighs. "I wish I knew a way to erase her memories of those days. She deserved so much better than that. Especially because her father wasn't her father."
"You know it too, huh? So, who was her sperm donor then?"
"Well, he's dead now and can't enjoy parenthood...it was Jushiro. He only knew after the incident that made Yamma take over custody. He did everything for her even before he knew, once she started coming around to my office every night."
"What the hell was the big idea, keepin' her from her parents?"
"Yamma wanted her to go batshit crazy and be the ultimate weapon against the Quincy."
"Why?"
"I don't know. I wish I did."
The office door bangs open suddenly and that fat bastard from squad 2 goes flyin' past my head, landin' under the window behind Shunsui. "Swee! If you don't tell this fat, disgusting bastard to stop harassing me, I'm going to make bacon out of him!" Harmona yells from the door.
"See? She's a good weapon." I laugh.
"Harmona, what did he do?"
"That fat pig touched my ass and offered to marry me, then called me a liar when I told him I'm marrying my captain."
"You should be grateful I'm even taking the time to offer marriage. You have no idea what you're missing!" the blob groans.
"I'm missing out on being squashed to death by your lard ass!" she snarls.
"As if anyone would marry such a bad mannered woman like you."
"Actually, dumb ass, I am marryin' her. So watch it or I'll use you for practice." I growl.
He gulps. "Yes, sir! Forgive me!"
"Go spread it around to all your little friends too."
He darts past me and Harmona punches him, sendin' him flyin' back through the door. I hear her grumblin' some pretty nasty words under her breath before turnin' to leave. "Sorry to disturb you two."
"Sit and have a drink, Harmona. Let's talk about some things." Shunsui says, smilin' at her.
"I don't want to intrude."
"You're not."
She sighs. "Is this the part where you try to talk me out of marrying him and tell me I deserve better or some shit like that?
"Uhm...no?"
"Captain?"
"Will you stop and sit down already, you silly woman. He's invitin' you for drinks, not to the slaughter house." I grouch.
"Think I'd rather go to the slaughter house. Least I can eat."
"Why are you hungry? It's past lunch time." I snap, already knowin' the answer.
"They were eating fish. I don't eat fish anymore. I'm not a stupid feline." she growls.
"Harmona, darling, sit down. I'll have Nanao go get us a snack."
She sits obediently. "Oh, I suppose I can stay if you're feeding me."
***Harmona POV***
I can feel more than see Zaraki's irritation at my skipping of meals. I just can't bring myself to eat another fish. When I ran away, that was the only thing I could catch at first until I got bigger and faster by training from sun up to sundown and even then I'd train late into the night sometimes. When I first left the Seireitei, my wolf form was still a juvenile. Only four foot tall and not very fast.
"Harmona!" he snaps suddenly, making me jump.
"Sorry. Guess I zoned out a bit, didn't I?" I sigh.
"I asked what you wanted to eat." Shunsui says gently.
"It doesn't matter. Just no fish or natto or tea. Please."
"Sure thing."
Nanao seems to already know what to do, as she strides out dutifully. Shunsui focuses on me. "Are you ok? Past couple days you've seemed out of it."
"I'm fine."
"Bullshit." Zaraki growls.
"Alright, the nightmares are getting worse. Lay off."
"Have you tried meditation?" Shunsui asks.
"No. I don't have the patience for it."
"How do you talk to your sword then?"
"I just slip into his world."
"When she talks to Okami, it's like she's lucid dreamin' or somethin'. She talks out loud in our world but her eyes are shut and she clearly ain't here." Zaraki sighs.
"I've never heard of that before." Shunsui says.
"I'm weird. So what?"
"Nothing. So, the wedding...any thoughts on it?"
"We're sitting right here, in front of you. Can't we just elope or something?"
"No!" Zaraki snaps, to my surprise.
"Why not!?"
"Harmona, if you and Zaraki were just normal soul reapers, eloping would be fine. But Lieutenant class and above are required to have a public ceremony." Shunsui sighs.
"Why though?"
"Because it's law. A Captain or Lieutenant class soul reaper are high ranking, therefore the celebration has to include everyone. It's also to make sure everyone knows the new spouse so stuff like what Omeyeda is doing doesn't happen. Sort of like a safety measure."
"It's stupid. I'm capable of killing whoever bothers me."
"But we don't want you killing people. Come on, it won't be that bad."
I glare at Zaraki. "Who's the pain in the ass now?"
"Want me to call it off?" he growls.
I sigh. "No. I don't....you realize I'm going to look ridiculous, right? I don't know a thing about fancy hairdo's or make up."
"I know just the person to help with hair. I'm pretty sure he said he'd shave you bald if you let anyone else touch it."
"Yumichika? Fine. I trust him."
"Rangiku could do your make up." Shunsui says.
"Yumichika can do make up too. He used to do Yachiru's every Halloween."
"Why not both?"
I sigh. "Fine. This will be the last time you see me all girly and dolled up."
"Oh, it'll be fun. We haven't had a reason to celebrate for a long time, kiddo." Shunsui chuckles. "Make you a deal, you try to have fun and I'll let you two off for two whole weeks for a honey moon."
"Alright."
"Do you two have a date in mind?"
"I think sometime in the winter with the snow on the ground. Her hair is pretty against all the white." Zaraki says.
"Well, December is her birth month if you go winter route."
Zaraki glares at me. "So, we've got a month narrowed down. What day?"
"Huh?"
"She refuses to tell me when her birthday is. Now I know it's December. So what do you want me to do? Say happy birthday every day for an entire month?"
"The seventh, alright? Why's it so important?" I snap.
"Because it is. To me anyway."
"You two sure you should be getting married? There seems to be a rift." Shunsui says.
"The rift is because...I'm scared, alright? I'm fucking terrified of this, Swee. I love him but the whole idea of him loving me scares me. Nobody has ever loved me before and I'm terrified of screwing it up and losing the best thing that's ever happened to me."
Both captains blink at me and I curl into a ball in the chair. Shunsui clears his throat. "That's pretty messed up logic, you know. You're afraid of losing him so you hide things and push him away?"
"He doesn't seem to mind. He always comes back for more." I smile a little.
"Tch. I come back because I love you, numbskull." Zaraki grumbles.
"Harmona, give him a chance to show you. I've known Zaraki a lot of years. He never does anything without a reason and he's not a man who admits to his emotions often so if he says he loves you, he really does."
"Alright, dad." I growl. "I think spring would be better for a wedding. You forget I don't wear shoes, Captain."
"I could always ask Toshiro to make some snow." he chuckles.
"I have a better idea. What if you did it in winter but we can put something down on the ground to protect your feet? Like a white runner or something." Shunsui says.
"Alright, that'll work."
Nanao brings back the food and passes it out. "I wasn't sure what you like so I got you some peanut chicken and mochi. Is that alright?"
I smile. "Perfect."
She smiles back and nods. "Captain Kyorakou, do you need me any more? If not, I'm going to take a break. My allergies are killing me today and I'm very sleepy."
"No, you go ahead and get some rest. We're just shooting the breeze." Shunsui says kindly.
"Thank you."
I'm too busy eating to notice the men staring at me or Nanao leaving...
****Kenpachi POV****
Watchin' her eat, she seems pretty happy. I wonder if this is a special thing with good memories attached to it or somethin'. Shunsui has a small smile on his face too. "What's the story behind that?"
"The first night she spent in my office, that's what I fed her. Along with cookies and milk later before finally going to bed. She stayed on the couch and I laid on the futon closer to the door so if Mori tried to come in and hurt her, I could stop him."
"Did I hear the word cookie?" she asks.
Shunsui takes somethin' out of his desk and tosses it to her. Her smile makes me smile. I can see the little kid she deserved to be in there as she starts munchin' on the damn cookie. Shunsui shakes his head. "Spoiled heathen."
"Anyway, how about January?" I say.
"Fine. No pink!"
"No pink." I agree, smirkin' a bit.
"Are we going with a western culture wedding or a traditional?" Shunsui asks.
"Why not mix it? I like parts of both. Like I like cake and a ring exchange. But I like traditional Japanese attire." Harmona says right before yawnin'.
"You have plenty of time to decide the details. Harmona, why don't you go take a nap?"
Hearin' no answer, I glance over. Damn woman is out like a light. "You got any idea why she gets so damn sleepy right after she eats?"
"Could she be pregnant?"
"No. This has happened every time she's been fed since I found her. It's nothin' new."
"Hmm...I really don't know. Maybe ask Isane. She might have an idea."
I get to my feet and lift Harmona. She snuggles into my chest. "My Pachi."
"She's attached to you for sure. Just be careful. I can see a lot of differences in her behavior from when she was a kid."
"Yeah, I got it. It would help if she could sleep."
"I'll have Isane come talk to you today. Make sure Harmona isn't around. I don't think it'd be good for her to hear anything."
"Shunsui, lots of orchids."
"What?"
"I noticed she seems to like orchids a lot. She's always sniffin' em and gets a smile on her face when she sees one. I wanna fill the place with lots of orchids."
"You got it. Any particular color?"
"All kinds. She doesn't seem to mind the color of the flower."
"I'll search around and see what I can do and get it done. Go take a nap with her. You look tired too. Course, if she's been screaming as much as you say with the nightmares, I don't doubt you are tired."
"Can't get nothin' by you, can I?"
"Nope."
***Squad 11 - Captains Quarters***
Harmona has slept the entire way home and still seems to be sleepin' good so I lay her on the bed and climb in beside her. I've noticed the raccoon eyes lately. Isane better know somethin' to help her sleep. She hates tea so I know she isn't going to drink the same shit Yumichika does to help him sleep.
"Pachi?"
"Hmm?"
"Don't leave me. I know I'm hard to deal with and a complete pain in the ass...just please don't leave me. I'm trying to get better. I'm just so scared. Like a rat in a cage."
"I ain't leavin' you, Wolf. I put too much time and energy into you. Plus I love ya. When are you gunna believe me?"
She snuggles closer, throwin' her arm and leg over me. "When the wedding is over. Now go to sleep. It's nap time."
I smirk. "You brat."
"Yours."
I watch her sleep for a little while before closin' my eyes and lettin' myself sleep...
***Harmona POV***
I wake up alone. The sky is getting darker as the sun goes down. Where could Zaraki have gone? I close my eyes and feel his reiatsu in the office. Along with Isane's a little further from him. Like maybe he's on one side of his desk and she's on the other. They must be talking. I yawn and stretch before unfolding myself and going outside. Ikkaku is on the porch with Yumichika. "Hey, bout time you woke up. Dinner is in the works. Zaraki and Kotetsu are havin' a meeting in the office about some damage a few of the men caused to the infirmary earlier."
"Go figure." I laugh a little and sit between the two men. "I'd give anything for a few good sleeps."
"That why you look like a panda?"
"Nightmares. I get a lot of them."
"Captain Zaraki told us to stay here in case you woke u-p and were upset. He didn't mention nightmares."
"Eh, I'll get over them, eventually. My childhood was messed up."
"So, what's this we hear from the gossip birds about you and Zaraki getting married?" Yumichika asks.
"He asked me two days ago and I said yes. He wants a January wedding because he says my hair is pretty in the snow."
"Yes, it is. You have to let me do your hair. I insist on it."
"I was going to ask you anyway, feather brain." I laugh.
"Good. I'll keep it simple, yet beautiful."
"I have no idea what to wear. I've never worn a dress before." I groan.
"My dear, I will have you looking like a queen, if you let me help."
"It's only March now. You've got plenty of time to help."
"You know he's going to go on and on about this the entire time you're planning, right?" Ikkaku sighs.
"It's ok. I don't mind...I'm glad for the help, honestly."
"See? Someone appreciates my tastes." Yumichika snaps.
"Yeah yeah. Good for you."
"What's eating you, Ikkaku?" I ask.
"A girl he likes. He wants to-"
"Shut up, Yumichika!"
"Maybe I could help." I say softly.
"Fine. I got a thing for Nanao. I think she's shy and would say no if I ask her out for drinks though."
"Do you like her because she's pretty or for her brains?"
"Both, actually. I like everything about her."
"Why not ask her out for tea instead of drinks sometime. Tell her you'd like to talk to her, lieutenant to lieutenant and would like to do it over tea or coffee." I suggest.
"That might work." Yumichika says slyly.
"Maybe. What if she says no?" Ikkaku asks.
"Well then leave her little notes on her door every morning. Don't sign your name. She'll eventually open the door right as you're sticking the notes up. And the notes should tell her one thing you like about her every day. Like 'you have beautiful eyes' or 'I love your smile'. Small compliments go a long way." I say.
"For someone who hates people, you sure do know a lot about them." he comments.
"I study people. That's all." I shrug.
"Try it. I bet you'll get an answer sooner or later." Yumichika urges gently.
"Oh fine. If it'll get you to shut up."
I perk up a little when the office door opens. Kotetsu and Zaraki step out, him with a scowl and her with a worried frown. "Just try it. It won't hurt, Captain Zaraki."
"Fine. Go away." he growls.
She shakes her head and waves at me before leaving the barracks. I raise an eyebrow. "That seems unusual."
"Oh, I'm sure she yelled at him." Yumichika laughs before getting to his feet. "Come on. Dinner should be ready by now. I believe they were making egg rolls."
"I love egg rolls."
"We know." Ikkaku sighs.
Zaraki is already heading to the mess hall. That's unusual. Apparently Kotetsu has really pissed him off. I walk with the men, listening to their chatter.
****Kenpachi POV****
Isane's bright idea is to drug her. I don't want to. Not only will she smell it but if she's sleepin' all the damn time, she won't be able to train or do anythin' useful. Course, she's not much better now, since she falls asleep every few hours. Isane warned me about a couple side effects that might not be too bad but I don't give a shit about those. I didn't really pay attention either. I'll hide it in her food tonight and maybe only give it to her every couple of days or so. I grab my plate and her plate before headin' to the table. I grumble as I pull a pill out of my pocket and pop it open, puttin' it in her food.
"Whatcha doin', Captain?" someone asks suspiciously.
"She ain't sleepin' due to nightmares so I've been ordered to drug her and see if it helps before they take her and put her in the infirmary for a few weeks." I sigh.
"Oh...it won't hurt her, will it?"
"Not supposed to. We'll see."
I stir her food up and wait. She's gunna hate me.
***Harmona POV***
I sit next to Zaraki and start eating. He has a funny look on his face. "They used too much pepper, I think but it's not that bad." I say, digging into the rice.
"That all? Thought I tasted somethin' funny. Maybe that's it." he grunts.
"What's got you in a bad mood?"
"I'm just irritated with havin' to pay repair costs to the infirmary again. Fuckin assholes tore it up."
He's lying a little. "Is there something else?"
"Not that I'm allowed to tell you. Eat your dinner then let's go take a bath."
I smile a little. "Bath sounds good right now. I've got a kink in my neck from throwing that fat jerk earlier."
"Shoulda stretched first." he teases.
I elbow him in the side before practically inhaling the rest of my food then throwing back the sake. "That was good, other than the pepper."
"I'll tell em to lay off next time."
Something doesn't feel right...I'm getting too hot all the sudden. Too hot and really fucking wet. "Did you drug me?" I ask quietly.
"Don't get mad. I told Isane you're havin' trouble sleepin' and she told me to put it in your food so you could sleep better." he says defensively.
"I'm not mad. I'm gunna go run the bath." I say before getting to my feet and dashing outside. When I get home, I tear my uniform off, not caring one bit that I'll have to pay for it. This drug is bad. My nerves are singing and I feel so hot and needy. He'd better hurry up. I get the bath running and even the feel of the water on my hand feels wrong. This is very very bad. What the fuck? Why would a sleeping medicine make me so goddamn horny? He's in for it when he gets home.
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