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Maybe Just For Tonight	By : yaoiismyantidrug Category: Bleach > Yaoi - Male/Male > Ichigo/Ishida Views: 86 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or the characters. I make no money off this work of fiction.

Chapter List
- 1-I know it's not the right thing
- 2-We can pretend it's alright
- 1
- 2
A/N: not a happy fic! I encourage you to read the summary, if you haven't already, especially if infidelity bothers you.

Kinda I want to
Maybe just for tonight
We can pretend it's alright

“Chad. Settle a bet for me. About Uryuu. Is he, or is he not, a pillow princess?” Ichigo asked.
“What?!” Uryuu exclaimed, and Chad brought a hand up to cover his smile. “Who, exactly, is this bet with?”
It was late, and Chad and Uryuu had been drinking beer at Ichigo’s apartment for a couple of hours now. Chad had had twice as much as Uryuu, and he seemed sober as a judge. Ichigo drank a little less than Chad, and he was sloshed as all get out, as evidenced by his latest conversational gambit.
And Uryuu was trying not to show it, but he was as drunk as he remembered being in recent history. He was surprised he could string words together, much less pronounce them properly.
Ichigo grinned wider, apparently pleased to have gotten Uryuu’s hackles up. “Keigo,” he said neutrally, and took a swig of his beer.
“Don’t answer him, Chad. Don’t say anything. I r’fuse to play along.” Looking back at Ichigo, Uryuu said, “Change the subject, moron.”
Ichigo shrugged and took another drink, then motioned toward Uryuu with his bottle. “What are you wearing?”
“Oh,” Uryuu said, caught off guard. He plucked at his pale cream button-up tunic, then smoothed a hand over his matching pants. He hadn't been certain of this outfit, but, knowing he'd only be seeing Chad and Ichigo tonight, had decided to wear it anyway. “It's linen,” he said finally.
“Okay,” Ichigo said. “It looks… comf’terble.”
Uryuu didn’t know if he was being genuine, or if that was his way of commenting without complimenting. It didn't matter—Ichigo changed the subject again and drunkenly dominated the ensuing conversation with Chad. Uryuu just sat back and watched.
After a while, Chad tightened his arm around Uryuu’s shoulders and kissed him on the top of the head. “I should go. Work early tomorrow.”
“Want me to go with you?” Uryuu asked.
“I’m going right to bed. Stay. Have fun,” Chad said, and he leaned closer to kiss Uryuu’s forehead.
Fun, Uryuu thought with a mental laugh. But other than the pillow princess comment, he had been having a surprisingly good time this evening.
When Chad rose from the couch, Uryuu followed him and waited while he slipped on his boots at the door.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Uryuu said, leaning up for a kiss. Chad cupped his face in both hands and kissed him, and after Uryuu gave him a quick hug, Chad said, “Bye, Ichigo.”
“Later, Chado!” Ichigo said, saluting him with his bottle.
Chad smiled at him, then aimed a softer smile at Uryuu. “See you tomorrow.”
“Okay,” Uryuu said, and grinned when Chad gave him one more kiss before stepping out the door.
“Mind if I stay awhile?” Uryuu asked, once the door closed behind Chad. Uryuu leaned against it, glad he’d kept his balance until Chad left—he didn’t know why, but he’d rather Chad not know the full extent of his inebriation.
“Sure,” Ichigo said with a crooked grin.
Uryuu made his slightly wobbly way back to the couch, where he dropped down onto it with an oof. He picked up his beer from the coffee table.
“I wish I had someone who looked at me the same way…” Ichigo slurred, gesturing toward the door with his beer bottle. “No, never mind.”
“Okayyyy…” Uryuu said, looking out of the corner of his eye at Ichigo. It wasn’t like him to get mushy, or even very emotional. Was Uryuu about to witness some sort of breakdown?
But then Ichigo sat up straighter in his chair. Still leaning, but not at risk of toppling the thing over. “I like your clothes,” Ichigo said. “Remind me of that outfit you were wearing when we went t’save Rukia.”
“It… wasn’t an outfit,” Uryuu corrected him.
“What?” Ichigo asked, frowning.
“It was a… uniform.” Uryuu couldn’t for the life of him figure out why the word uniform was suddenly so hard to enunciate.
“Well... Whatever it was. Looked really hot on you,” Ichigo said, by all appearances being completely sincere.
Uryuu’s cheeks burned. “Yeah, well…” he hesitated, then decided it wouldn’t hurt to be honest, since Ichigo had been with him. Speaking very carefully, he said, “I always thought you looked really good in your shinigami outfit.”
Ichigo laughed. “It was called a shika– shihakusho, as I’m sure you already know, you jerk.”
Still smiling, Ichigo pushed up out of his chair and swayed on his feet before he righted himself on the arm, nearly spilling the little beer left in his bottle. “You want another? I’ve got plenty.”
“I don’t know,” Uryuu said, swirling the very last dregs around in his bottle. “It's getting pretty late.”
“It’s okay,” Ichigo said, walking by Uryuu and grabbing his empty. “You c’n just crash here.” He went to the kitchen, then came back with two fresh beers, as if Uryuu had agreed.
“Kurosaki, I—”
“Jus’ stay for a couple more, at least.”
Uryuu sighed as he accepted the beer, then sighed again when Ichigo sat down beside him on the couch and stretched. His back popped a few times. “That chair…” Ichigo nodded toward the armchair he’d obviously bought second-hand. It was even mended on the arm with duct tape. “That chair sucks.”
Uryuu was surprised into a short laugh. “Why don’t you get rid of it?”
“‘Cause then I wouldn’t have somewhere t'sit when people come over.”
“Get a new one,” Uryuu said.
“Can’t afford one.”
Uryuu had nothing to say to that, so he just said, “Oh.”
They both took a few drinks of their beers, then Ichigo looked over at Uryuu, his face lighting up.
“Hey,” Ichigo said. “You know what it should be?”
“What what should be?” Uryuu asked, trying to think through the booze haze, but still thoroughly confused.
“What tonight should be. It should be Honesty Night,” Ichigo pronounced.
Uryuu could actually hear the capital letters.
Ichigo took another drink, holding eye contact with Uryuu, then continued. “No lies, no uh… uhmissions. We jus’ say what we think. No filters.”
What could it hurt, really? Uryuu thought. But he was going to need to be just a little more intoxicated for this. Working at the law firm, filters and omissions had become a large part of his usual vocabulary.
He took another drink of beer, this one a full swig instead of a sip. “Why not,” he said.
“Thass what I like to hear,” Ichigo said, grinning.
“So who goes first?” Uryuu asked, and he knocked back another drink.
“Hmmmm… Since you asked, I think you do,” Ichigo said, his grin going lopsided.
“Fine,” Uryuu said. He looked down at his crossed legs, then said, staring straight ahead, “I don’t think you’re as much of an asshole as I act like you are. Anymore, anyway.”
“Good,” Ichigo said, and he patted Uryuu on the shoulder. “Good start. Here’s mine: I really don’t think you’re an uptight, prissy bitch.”
“What?!” Uryuu squawked. “I didn’t know you—”
“I don’t, I said,” Ichigo said. “I never did. Okay?”
“All right,” Uryuu said, mostly mollified but still gently seething. “I like you better when you’re drunk. There.”
Ichigo laughed, apparently unoffended. “I like you better when I’m drunk, too.” Before Uryuu could bristle at him, Ichigo said, “Kidding, kidding! Okay. Here’s mine. I think you’re really hot.”
Uryuu glanced at Ichigo, then, seeing that he wasn’t poking fun, said, “I… think you’re a handsome man, too.”
“Handsome man!” Ichigo laughed, slapping the back of the couch behind Uryuu’s shoulders.
“‘Kay. Brace yerrself.” Ichigo took a deep breath, then said quickly, “Sometimes I think about what you and Chad look like when you’re fucking.”
“Seriously?” Uryuu asked, turning to frown at him. “That’s… inappropriate.”
Ichigo shrugged. “Honesty night. You’re both hot. Anyway, less go. Do you… ever wonder?”
“Wonder what?” Uryuu asked, shoulders beginning to tighten, hoping that Ichigo wasn't going where he suspected he might be going with this.
“What things could’ve…” Ichigo burped, then continued. “Could’ve been if we’d. You know. Gotten together.”
Uryuu’s eyebrows shot up, unbelieving that he actually would come out and say it, and so soon.
“You know,” Ichigo said. “There was a… time. For a while, ‘bout eight years ago. When I thought we might.”
Uryuu suppressed a sigh, because he did remember. There had been a time when their antagonistic banter had become markedly flirtatious, in their own way. When Ichigo had seemed to find reasons to invite him over, or to show up at his apartment, or spend time with him in any way. And Uryuu hadn’t minded, at all.
“But then… you started dating Chad, and that was… it.”
Uryuu nodded slowly.
“So, d’you wonder?” Ichigo asked.
Now Uryuu did sigh, because he’d hoped with all this talking, Ichigo would forget the original question. And it was Honesty Night.
“Sometimes,” he finally said. “I think about it.”
Ichigo grinned wide, then drained the rest of his beer and pushed up from the couch.
“Finish that,” he said, clinking his empty against Uryuu’s half-empty.
Uryuu rolled his eyes, then took a few big gulps, eyes watering when he lowered the bottle. “Close as I’m gonna get,” he said, coughing as he handed it over.
Ichigo disappeared into the kitchen and came back with two fresh beers. When he sat on the couch and handed one over, Uryuu asked,”How long ‘ve you waited to spring Honesty Night on me?
“I dunno.” Ichigo cleared his throat to try to mask a burp, but that only made it sound more disgusting. “Sorry.”
Uryuu wrinkled his nose, then asked, “How long?” again. “It is Honesty Night, remember?”
Ichigo laughed softly. “You got me. I don’t know. Months? Maybe. I saw it in a movie a while back and it seemed like a good idea.”
“How did it go? In the movie?”
“Really good. Well? Good.”
“No, I mean… what happened?” Uryuu thought he knew anyway, but he wanted to hear Ichigo say it.
“Oh.” Ichigo’s face was turning pink. “They, uh, hooked up.”
Uryuu’s pulse, already quickening, began to pound in his ears. “Is that what you’re trying to do?”
Ichigo looked at Uryuu, his brown eyes hazy. “What do you think?”
That wasn’t an answer. Uryuu folded his hands together in his lap, held eye contact, and waited.
“Yeah, okay? Yes.” Ichigo stood and paced back and forth beside the little coffee table. “It’s Honesty Night. So here’s some honesty. I like you. I really like you. And I hate that I didn’t ask you out b’fore you started seeing Chad, and I’d hate to do anything to hurt ‘im, but… there coulda been something here. I think there is something here, still. And I really wanna… see what it’s like, t’be with you.”
Uryuu realized that if he was going to leave, now would be the time. Staying might be opening himself to the possibilities Ichigo was so interested in.
Staying might be the first step toward sleeping with Ichigo.
He took a drink, watched Ichigo’s broad shoulders and narrow waist, watched the pained, frustrated scowl on his face, and… stayed.
“Ichigo. Relax. You’re making me nervous,” Uryuu said, true for a few different reasons. “I think… there could have been something here, too.”
Ichigo slowly raised his head to look at Uryuu. “Do you really?”
“Yes. I have wondered b’fore…” Uryuu trailed off as Ichigo sat on the couch beside him again. He took a deep breath. “Wondered what it could’ve been like.”
Ichigo draped his arm over the back of the couch, surrounding Uryuu’s shoulders, but not quite touching him. He asked, “D’you think we could… find out?”
“Ichigo,” Uryuu said, and he drew in a deep breath and faced forward, away from Ichigo. “I… don’t know. I... don’t.”
“How can I convince you?”
“You can’t. I have to… decide,” Uryuu said, knowing he was lying, now. He was at the tipping point, and whatever Ichigo did in the upcoming minutes would help make up his mind.
“Can I at least kiss you?” Ichigo asked, letting his arm wrap warm around Uryuu’s shoulders. “We can stop there. If you want.”
Uryuu closed his eyes and dropped his head back against Ichigo’s arm. He breathed out heavily. Then he felt Ichigo’s fingers stroking his jaw, turning his face toward him.
“Ichigo…” Uryuu said warningly.
“Just wanna kiss you,” Ichigo whispered.
Uryuu feared that this was his last chance to get out of Ichigo’s apartment with his fidelity intact. Ichigo’s fingers stroked his cheek tenderly, then his thumb brushed delicately over Uryuu’s lower lip, and there was his last chance, gone.
He opened his eyes and whispered, “Okay, Ichigo.”

---tbc
Notes:
This actually did hurt me to write D: I don't know if that's weird or not! But there it is. I also don't know if it hurts to read, especially if you're not as invested in these pairings as I am lol
Comments and kudos are much appreciated! I know this isn't everybody's cup of tea, but I'd love to know what you think :)
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Maybe Just For Tonight

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