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Reviews for That Dreaded Word

By : Platinumsabr

From xSTALKERx on January 29, 2009
Awesome chapter. No fighting, not much "action" but it progressed the story along and gave us even more insight into Gwen's Zanpaktou. It has set us up for the awesomeness to come!

I also like how Soi seems to be slowly becoming more confident in front of others, even to the point of teasing them about it. It shows her character is coming along well. As for Gwen finally letting go of his past, it was something he had to do. No there is nothing holding him back from taking his future by the horns and running with it, well, aside from the crazy evil people and the seemingly infatuated with him Ai.

I eagerly look forward to the next chapter, as it looks like we'll be getting to the point where 'evil dude' makes his move on Gwen, though I imagine Soi (and Tatsuki in the #2 position) will have some things to say about that. I hope Ichigo makes an appearance as well, only to kick some ass and smother Tatsuki in kisses :p

Also, Asuka appearance!!! It's nice to see her again, I loved her character.
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From moonymuch on January 26, 2009
Hey-o! Thanks for the e-mail and the shout-out. I will probably need the e-mails, since school has started and I'm likely to forget to check.

Haha, I wondered if the SWA was going to join in on the fight. They were tailing them anyway, so they were bound to be in the area! That Ai girl really creeps me out, especially since her name means "love" - jeez that woman is twisted. It's nice that Gwydion saw Soi Fong's stumbling words for what they really were - concern for him. I hope that they manage to finish their date!
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From butlerbrat0822 on January 25, 2009
hey, i got a question for you. i wanted to contact you via email but i don't know how. i wanted to discuss somthing. although it wasn't about this story, i didn't think that you were still checking your other ones. if you could please email me at butlerbrat0822@aol.com i would appreciate it. and by the way, out of any of the fan fictions i have read for any story, yours are definatly the best i've read by far. your style of writing is amazing. thanks for continuing to entertain us readers.
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From xSTALKERx on January 24, 2009
Another awesome chapter.

I liked how you described Gwen's fighting style, expanded on his zanpaktou and did his reaction to Soi's new look.

Also, to me it seems like the baddies are very confident in their ability to get Gwen to join them. It's obvious he isn't going to do it willingly so I wonder what they have up their sleeves...

Until then!
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From Watcher on January 23, 2009
I agree completely, and thank you for your kindness and tolerance, especially in light of the great compliment you had just paid me at the time of that stupid rant. While I'd like to apologize elaborately, I think we'll both be better off if I take a leaf from the kindergarden book, say sorry, and simply promise never to do it again.

Sorry. Never again. Feel free to restore any changes made for my sake.

Now. Actual review.

I'm mildly happy. One thing I enjoyed was that every time I thought this chapter would take a turn I wouldn't like much, it instead charged fearlessly along the path of cohesive logic.

When the fight began and Soi had trouble penetrating the beast's defense, I immediately thought "Dang, it would be awesome if the Association joined in and just scrub rushed it." And they did! Admittedly, only Rukia did, and she did it in a rather anticlimactic way. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a tad disappointed with the ease of the creature's defeat, but encasing its body alive in ice is a good and stylish way to ensure future revelations about these "foot soldiers" without too great a suspension of disbelief.

When Soi tripped that line about leaving, I groaned and prepared for a stubborn argument. Instead, Gwydion came to see it for what it was: affection and concern.

When Gwydion turned away from the Hollow's corpse to face Soi, I sighed. All hands brace for impact, I thought. Angst on the starboard bow!
Instead, we were gifted with a happier scene of romance and forgiveness.

I honestly cannot thing of a single thing that stood out to me as illogical, and I wish I could say the same as my *own* work.

I enjoyed seeing Gwydion in action again, and I'm glad that *someone* else has picked up on the fact that older zanpakuto have longer commands. The bone halberd was sufficiently creepy, though I admit to liking the pen better. Lastly, I am torn between calling his rage excessive and adequate given Ai's crazy stalkery. (Stalkery? Daggome, am I going to keep popping kennings like that?)

Gwydion's action scene was excellent, though I would have liked one or two more specific examples of areas where much of the fight is described in generalized terms. Seeing Gwydion gawk for a moment as Soi's... enhancement was pretty funny. Also, Izanami's little sigh pushed my sadly whimsical mind into fits of mad laughter, not least because it resonated with my own. Like many of your protagonists, he is very powerful, but he also has some weaknesses that keep him from becoming as broken-tier as, say, WTECS Ichigo. Zing!

Don't get me wrong, I enjoy both your earlier work and Ichigo's role in it, even the bits I've marked out as instances of overpowering. But, as with Hiko Seijuro in Rurouni Kenshin, he's got a baaaaad case of SNK Boss Syndrome. No one's got a prayer, and that's just not interesting for me. Gwydion is good, but he's far from invincible, and I can appreciate that, especially his combination of acrobatic fighting style and utter lack of self confidence.

Anyway, to summarize, it was a fine chapter, and even though Soi's fight and the Association's scrub rush (or at least, Rukia's Second Dance) could have been longer in my opinion, there was never a dull moment.

The "bad," huh? ...Nooooo. I see your mind! Not a brainwashing/betrayal-over-misunderstanding! Anything but that!

(*Pauses, then laughs aloud*) Just a bit of fun. Don't take everything I say too seriously. I may not like so angsty(American) a plot twist as Gwydion's betrayal, but I'll keep reading anyway. Painful severance I can take, but after so strong a statement of loyalty to both Society and Soi as Gwydion's reaction to the creature this chapter... Well, taking the surgeon's side, even in a fit of emotion, just wouldn't fit.

All this is only my opinion, you understand. No matter what it may seem, I do appreciate that this is your story, and, while I may have gone a different way, you have my full support. Transform and roll out.
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From moonymuch on January 20, 2009
Haha, I knew the Shinigami Women's Association wouldn't be able to resist spying on Soi Fong's date! I hope she and Gwydion will be able to finish it, though!
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From JHHolliday on January 18, 2009
Oh for the days when romance meant there could be dragons. Very good, although I wish you could start seeing the dark lining to silver clouds. But hey, I have a venomous personality. Keep up the good work. Yay for updating!
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From Watcher on January 17, 2009
Ah, the Women�s Association. How could I have forgotten? Perfect comic timing. Here I am, slightly bored, and suddenly they appear like water in the desert, wisecracking and committing acts of borderline stalkery. Only, I miss the presence of Chairwomen Kusajishi herself...

...So, Momo and Kira, eh? Eh? Say no more. Nod's as good as a wink to a blind bat, eh? Eh?

Praise. Hurrah! The plot makes its triumphant return to the forefront (though I commend its continued presence in the background), and the romance has finally progressed beyond the initial, awkward, reconnection/reconnaissance stages. I like their relationship. Lonely people finding solace and healing in one another has fascinated me since Rear Window.

In addition, significant character development has taken place. Both feel more comfortable, with themselves and one another, though I find that it was conveyed best via gesture (no eye patch or prosthetic, new clothes and smiles) rather than extended internal monologue. I do not exaggerate when I say it *was* very sweet to read, and seeing both of them *happy* knotted my stomach up. (In a good way, which has nothing to do with the indigestion I have suffered from overconsumption of bacon.)

Criticism. Onyx? Freakin' *onyx*? So many great words for dark (ebon, tenebral, sable, and raven off the top of my head (Last one's kinda cliched(Did I just put parenthesis *inside parenthesis*... inside parenthesis now that I think about it))), and you use onyx twice in the same section. This reaction may seem a tad excessive, and to be honest it probably is, but onyx is just outside my comfort zones as far as adjective obscurity is concerned. Please, don't turn such a readable story into a veritable flood of enigmatical, garrulous verbosity.

...That was probably an unfairly vicious (and hypocritical, given its length) reaction, especially over two words, though having spent a few minutes typing it, I'll leave it up.

...I just don't like the word onyx, okay?

Anyway, the build-up to the date dragged a little for me, though, being male, I know not what others shall think. Besides, it served its purpose in showcasing both characters' ineptitude in the matters romantical. (Is that a word?) I could argue that it has already been established, but this *is* a serial, so everything bears a little repeating.

I found the date itself well-done, and thought its simplicity well befit both characters. Soi's changing body was expected, though I am grateful to find she has skipped the acne.

Finally, and to summarize, despite the middle few paragraphs I *did* enjoyed the meat of the chapter very much, and I sincerely beg your pardon if I have offended. I won't take anything back (review=criticize as well as praise), but I also will do my best to be constructive in my criticism... all of which makes the onyx rant look even worse.

On a side note, and I hope I'm not drawing the wrong conclusion here, but I am flattered, just *flattered* beyond words, that you would name the chapter after one of my comments. My fire to improve their quality burns nearly as bright as my determination to write more of my story here. Thank you, thank you so much...

Unless... You came up with it on your own... In which case, I cannot apologize enough for being an arrogant jerk. Please, forgive me...
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From xSTALKERx on January 17, 2009
I loved the chapter! I knew the "date at home" idea would work out!

It's kinda a shame they didn't get to kiss at the end, but they'll get theirs eventually!

Yoruichi's reaction to Soi's sudden growth was perfect. I re-read that part of the chapter 3 times because I liked it so much!

Sorry for the short review, but I feel I can express my feelings toward the latest chapters in two words. Loved it.

I eagerly await the next chapter!
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From Watcher on January 10, 2009
Not a lot to say about chapter seven. Things played out more or less as anticipated, though I greatly desire to know why all characters across all fiction seem to enjoy being punched in the face so much.

Villains: Eh, I was hoping for more of them, but just three will certainly work if they are properly pulled off. Knock 'em dead.

...You know, I didn't realize the horrible pun implicit in that last sentence until this had been up for a while.
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From JHHolliday on January 07, 2009
Finally updated! Great new chapter, as always. Hope this trend will last!
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From moonymuch on January 05, 2009
Awww. Confused and hormonal Soi Fong is just too cute. I really enjoyed her interaction with Kin and Yoruichi - the dynamic they have is just too fun. Yoruichi tearing up like a proud mommy was hysterical and touching at the same time, I really liked it. That being said, the interaction with Ichigo and Gwydion was priceless as well. Sometimes I envy men for being able to punch each other out and be buddies afterwards! But maybe Soi Fong is being a little too mushy? I know she's in love, and heaven knows that can bring the mushiness out in all of us, but I would think that she'd still be a little bit wary, especially since her feelings are so strong, do you know what I mean? But that's just me.

Creepy villains! I'm rather scared! Great chapter. :D
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From Watcher on January 05, 2009
Sigh. Gwydion, Gwydion...

So long on Earth, *Japan* even, you've practically gone native, and yet you *still* haven't read any shojo manga? I realize it takes inches off your manhood, but none can resist the curiosity, just once.

Glad to see the plot's hopping along. Succubus lady: inevitable, but inevitable for a reason. I just hope Gwydion's angst(German pronunciation) doesn't morph into angst(phonetic pronunciation), leading to his abandonment of Soul Society to join the invading Horde, establishment as evil general, and ultimate redemption at Soi's hands.

Just shooting a plot rat before it infects the wholesome plot beef, you understand. Good luck, and sorry for the late review.
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From Daydreamer79 on December 21, 2008
Thanks for the update it was good. I am enjoying this sequel in your bleach universe alot. SoiFon is one of the few women in Bleach that don't annoy me to death. Keep up the good work and i'm looking forward to the next chapter. Happy Holidays~
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From sheastar334 on December 13, 2008
She ran? SHE RAN!!!! Oh! I can't wait to see the reason she ran. It better be good. Really good, cause it was really silly to run. But you know what's best. I kinda know I'm not gonna like 'Cat Chick' at all. (Cat chick is unnamed clingy chick, fyi.)But this chapter was nice, it made me giggle, which is always cool. Can't wait for the update!!!
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