Reviews for Middle Grounds

BY : Khallsnea

  • From Raymy on April 16, 2013

    Chapter 5: I took a while to review so I'll make it extra long.

    I like that you use words not in common usage, like "craven and fortnight". I may have commented in an edit that I would use "coward" instead of "craven" but I've changed my mind. My mind is more stimulated when I read an interesting word like "craven" or one I only read in period literature like "fortnight." So please continue to surprise.

    In the first section with Inoue, it's really nice. I like her much better with this depth and oh, shall we say, a little bit left of centre. She was already quirky but now her quirks are developing into kinks. Not from her perspective; it's all normal for her. At least Ichigo can understand that he doesn't need to suppress his thoughts around her. It's good to have someone to really be yourself with.

    On to the main sextion, pun intended. Love the teasing between Ichigo and Grimm. Pity they were interrupted. Yeah, Grimm and Shiro got to let loose, but I was curious to see how Ichigo would back out, or if he even would. He might repress his conservative side just to save face with Grimm, not to mention he was drowning in his own arousal.

    I also found it interesting that Grimm gets off on seeing Ichigo/Shiro lick blood from his lips and fingers. Obviously, he's imagining the taste himself, but it's more than just yummy, it's erotic. Is that just a Hollow thing or is it specific for Grimm? Hmmn. Lots of blood play: Grimm licking it, Shiro coating his hand to use it as lubricant. You should probably add "BP" to your story tags. I don't have a problem with the blood, but it's courteous to warn readers. (I didn't think of it until now)

    Hah! That's so hilarious. Shiro is fine with passing out because he'd rather have a great fuck than be careful and heal his wounds. I think the idea of one's inner thoughts/world having its own identity to be very scary. Teetering on the edge of split personality, there. But it's not that surprising with Ichigo. He had a severe childhood trauma, and he's repressing what he considers to be "inappropriate" thoughts, especially in your story. His desire to have violent sex is obvious to Shiro and as the hollow is Ichigo's "alter ego", it's not surprising that he feels the same. However, Shiro doesn't have any ridiculous hang-ups about it. What, does Ichigo think he'll go over to the dark side if he gives himself the freedom to enjoy it?

    And who is Grimm's "usual lover" in Las Noches? I have a guess but I'm not gonna tell.

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  • From Raymy on March 24, 2013

    Chap 4: So we find out that Gin has noble aspirations of the shinigami and hollows accepting one another in the spirit of working toward a common goal. He's willing to take a rough road to see that come to pass, including eliminating those that don't share his vision. Oh sure, he says he doesn't want to kill Yamamoto, but feels his struggle would be easier if he were to have died "in battle". Yeah, wouldn't all our lives be easier if the obstacles in our way would just vanish? I don't see Ichigo as being that kind of person although, I have yet to see where you'll take his character. Will he agree with Gin or will he look for a peaceful solution? What will happen when he isn't the saviour of Soul Society but a threat that must be eliminated? There you have it, Yamamoto is no different than Gin in that respect. And these are the hard decisions that leaders must make, to sacrifice the few for the good of the many. Ah, so many lessons I've learned from Star Trek. This was a good chapter to advance your story and I'm looking forward to more.

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  • From Anon on March 21, 2013

    Awesome chapter

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  • From Raymy on March 10, 2013

    Chap 1-3: Yep. This is getting interesting. Aside from some spelling and grammar (rereading a hundred times or getting a pre-reader helps, but stuff still sneaks through, I know), I really like the premise. Taking it in a whole new direction is difficult but you do a good job of explaining why it might go this way. Mmm. I'd like to comment on lots of specific things but I'm gonna keep this one short and expound on my thoughts as I read more, k? BTW, I'll pre-read if you want. My email is on my profile.

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  • From Anon on March 10, 2013

    Will Orihime join in with Ichigo and Grimmjow?

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